Playtime At Hazmat

Writing, but elsewhere

2011-12-21T12:38:00.000-05:00

Greetings, Hazmat Fans!

I have been MIA from Hazmat of late, but I have been writing. No, really! See that ticker off in the right hand column there? I completed NaNoWriMo this year and have a finished (if very rough) draft of a novel. Big WOO HOO there!

I've also been writing over at Fiction 365 too. HERE's a link to those shenanigans. It's a really cool site, and if any of you dabble in the land of fiction, you should check it out and submit some things there too.

I also started a Deviant Art page for some of my photography. (Here)

There are other things in the works here in Hazmatland too ... an Etsy store, a CafePress store, and an overhaul of this here blog. 2012 will be a busy year for The Hazmat Crew. Stay tuned for some more awesomeness in the next few months!

Invisible Hero

2011-05-09T17:53:00.002-04:00

http://invisiblehero.net/

Here's a shameless plug for my friends' new Web Series - "Invisible Hero" - check it out!!

Monday Night Wrasslin' Wrapup

2011-04-26T20:09:00.004-04:00

So, I missed all my WWE shows last week because we had company visiting, but I did get to watch last night's Monday Night RAW draft and Tough Enough episodes, so here are my quick thoughts on them.

First, I was sad to see Rima go on Tough Enough, but I do think it was the right choice. I like Rima - I think she's tough and genuine, and I think she'd make a great Diva. I hope she continues training, because I could definitely see her doing well in the ring if she gets her skills down better. I also think she handled herself really well when dealing with being in the bottom three twice, and her eventual elimination. Good for her for going for it - hope she keeps at it!

I was impressed by Jeremiah in the agility test - he almost looked weightless the way he was hopping around! Also, it was good to see more of Andy this week. I feel like we haven't seen enough of what he can do yet. I only caught the end of the previous episode, where Mickael and Ryan had to to a promo-off, but I have to say I was impressed by Ryan's promo. It was pretty good for an off-the-top-of-his-head attempt!

I love WWE Draft night on Raw! It's always fun to see everyone from both shows get together on a regular episode. I was hoping Cena would stay on Smackdown when he was drafted, but getting re-drafted at the end of the night was a fun twist - especially after the match with Alberto Del Rio. I was hoping to see Sin Cara and Rey Mysterio on the same show, but they've switched shows now. Hopefully there will be a crossover match in the future! Also, I think Dolph Ziggler looks even more like Kurt Russell now that he's changed his hair color.

I know I am one of the millions who is probably saying this, but I'm getting really sick of Michael Cole - and not in the 'I'm supposed to be sick of him because he makes a great heel' kind of way. I actually like him as a heel who shoots off his mouth too much, and the feud with King and JR has been fun. It's the latest bit of meanness in his insults that's getting annoying - the trashing of the Diva's matches (which, I have to say, are quite good! The Diva roster is full of some really great wrestlers! I'm a big fan of Natalya.) Also, his mean-spirited picking on JR for being fat - I'm hoping impressionable young fans aren't listening and taking notes on bullying. That's more their parents' responsibility than the WWE's, though. I keep wishing Kane or Big Show would just come in and choke slam him when he starts talking these days, but there doesn't seem to be any sign of that happening any time soon. Oh well. That's what the mute button is for!

That's all I've got for now. Smackdown should be interesting this Friday, now that the draft is through!

Thank You, Edge!!

2011-04-11T22:29:00.005-04:00

My heart is breaking right now; Edge retired tonight from the WWE on Monday Night Raw.

At first, I thought maybe it was a staged thing, but when he came out to his theme music, and took a big deep breath, the look on his face said it all. His speech was eloquent and emotional. (I will admit to shedding tears.) I'm glad he got to go out the champ, and I'm glad that he got the ovation that he did. He's a great wrestler, a funny and charismatic entertainer, and seemingly (I've never met him but I'd love to) a genuine, nice human being. I'm going to miss seeing his weekly performances on Raw and Smackdown.

My glittery "I Love Edge" sign, which I know looks like EDG, but I swear

there's an "E"on the other end. He actually pointed out my sign later

that night at this house show in Rochester, NY that Bryan and I went to -

right before he pantsed Ric Flair in the ring. (I really didn't need to

see Ric Flair's wrinkly, orange butt, but it was funny nonetheless!)

In my last post, I alluded to the fact that Edge inadvertently introduced me to my husband. It was my aunt who actually introduced me to my husband, but the first conversation he and I had upon meeting each other was all Edge. We were coworkers, I was new in the company, and we had never actually spoken to one another. Bryan came into my cubicle to ask me a work-related question, but before he could get past "Hi Marcy," he noticed the picture of Edge I had pinned up on my cubicle wall. Instead of asking me whatever he was there to ask me, the first thing he said to me was "You like Edge? He's my favorite wrestler!" I said "Mine too!" There's more to the story after that (Star Wars, Comic Books and Lord Of The Rings also played a role in our finding common interests) but we began hanging out to watch Raw and Smackdown. We've been together almost eight years now, almost four of them married - but I still remember our first conversation was about Edge.

When I first started watching WWE, it was by accident. (See previous post.) But what made me keep watching WWE was Edge. I loved his sense of humor, his attitude, and his wit on the mic. At the time I started watching in 2001, he was in an epic, hilarious feud with Kurt Angle. I wish I had started watching earlier so that I could have seen the Edge and Christian years as they happened, but over the years I've since caught up on all of that with DVDs and the interwebs. When Edge was out recovering from his neck surgery, he was writing a weekly column for the WWE's Website. It was hilarious! Through his musings on the Web site and also in his autobiography, I found he and I have a lot in common. I think in his retirement he should continue writing in some capacity, because he's actually quite good at it. Between his weekly column and his autobiography, I was thoroughly entertained.

I hope Edge stays a part of the WWE in some capacity, as he's a great entertainer, even if he can't wrestle anymore. I am very sad to see him go, but I'm glad to see him able to walk. I can't imagine what he must have gone through with his neck injury, but I'm glad he's not going to tempt fate and push it further.

Thank you, Edge, for everything. You will be greatly missed.

WWE Tough Enough, Week 1

2011-04-06T14:26:00.003-04:00

It is so great to see this series back!

Just some quick thoughts on this week's Tough Enough episode, as I have to hit my self-imposed daily page count on my Script Frenzy piece today, as well as finish a chapter of the novel and then start laying out a pitch book. I might eat a meal and maybe get some sleep in there as well, but we'll see how the other stuff goes first.

I agree completely with Stone Cold this week for his bottom 3 picks. I would love to see next week that Michelle and Eric got Stone Cold's point and take it to heart. Eric seemed like he could care less about being there, and Michelle was full of excuses. And Ariane - well, from the moment she opened her mouth on the show, I was like "Get the hook!" Going on and on with of her "Divalicious" prattle, and she's standing there with Trish Freakin' Stratus? CLUELESS. Completely and utterly clueless. I was embarrassed for her!

Can they really not comprehend the opportunity that they have here? Is this an example of this growing American sentiment that they are entitled to something that they don't have to actually work toward getting? Or were they really that blind-sided by the work involved behind being a pro wrestler? One would think that, to get to the point where you were getting a real shot at your dreams, you would have done a little research.

Sure, wrestling storylines are scripted, and the ring floor is flexible. You think you don't have to be in shape to last through a match? You think maybe it hurts to be thrown into a turnbuckle, or pitched off the top rope to land wrong? Ask The Miz, kids. We saw him get a concussion at Wrestlemania this weekend, as it happened. Everyone in the room here winced when his head bounced off the floor - and he still got up and finished the match.

One of the reasons I love pro wrestling is the people who do it for a living. You don't just 'be' a pro wrestler. It takes everything you have, and you have to truly love it to be it. The sacrifices they make to their bodies, their families, their lives, just to do something that they love so passionately for a living is inspirational. (Don't believe me? Watch "Beyond The Mat.") Would that we all had something - anything! - that we loved that much! When Big Show walks into the arena, his face lights up. When he smiles and waves to WWE fans, it is clear in his eyes that this guy loves what he does. These guys and gals are modern-day gladiators, giving up so much to entertain the masses. I think a lot of wrestling fans truly get that, and that is why they are so loyal and passionate about watching.

With that in mind, we go back to these three Tough Enough contestants in the final moments of this week's show. Do they really want this? Do they understand what it is they are getting into? The coming weeks will tell - but not for Ariane, as she was cut. Let's hope Eric and Michelle got the hint.

Top 10 Reasons Wrestlemania XXVII Was Awesome In High-Def

2011-04-05T17:42:00.003-04:00

10. Pyro is that much cooler in high-def, as was the kick-ass giant screen.

9. Michael Cole has tattoos?!

8. Stone Cold's beer spray was so vivid you could almost taste it. (Never mind that I was drinking a Corona at the time ...)

7. Undertaker has some serious pores.

6. You could make out individual particles of bronzer on Snookie.

5. Able to read fans' signs all the way up in the rafters!

4. I could, in fact, see John Cena. (drum riff!)

3. HHH's armpit razor burn visible as he was draped over the ropes in a closeup.

2. Chris Masters' pecs are that much shinier.

1. Watching the fan in the #44 jersey who was sitting ringside have THE BEST DAY EVER.

WWE & Me

2011-04-05T17:01:00.004-04:00

Before I start blogging more on the WWE, I should probably shine a little light on my history as a wrestling fan. Why? Because if any other wrestling fans read this and come across:

a. something that I have screwed up the proper WWE/WWF history while writing

b. something that I have misspelled or misrepresented or been misinformed about (or any other mis)

c. something in general I do not know about professional wrestling

... I want them to understand my background, so they don't hate on me. I am still a Padawan in the ways of the WWE, so bear with me, hardcore fans. I'm learning.

Yeah, that's me. I had to hand-paint this Hot Rod shirt

because I couldn't find one in my size. I'm THAT cool!

I grew up during the "Hulk Hogan's Rockin' Wrestlin'" cartoon era of the 80's, with a limited TV viewing scope of three whole channels. (ABC, CBS, NBC, and sometimes PBS if the wind was right and the antennae picked it up.) If it wasn't on these channels in the 80's, I didn't see it. (Occasionally we'd visit Grandmas' houses two hours north who both had cable, and there I got to see MTV and Nickelodeon, so that was a treat for us.) I remember watching the Hogan cartoon, and I remember watching some of the wrestling shows that came on our channels. I was very familiar with Hulk Hogan, Roddy Piper, Junkyard Dog, Captain Lou Albano, Iron Sheik, and Nikolai Volkov from the cartoon and from my cousin, Brian. He had every one of those bend-em wrestler action figures, and an awesome to-scale ring that my grandpa built for him. When we'd go hang out at my cousins' house, we'd always bust out the wrestlers and have matches. It was so cool!

Then I turned 12 and New Kids On The Block came on the scene. Wrestling suddenly wasn't my thing.

Now we come to the geekiest part of the story: How I got into watching WWE as an adult.

Years passed, and we fast-forward to the year 2001. I was living in Los Angeles, a couple years post-college. Flipping through channels one Monday night, I came across "Star Trek: The Next Generation" in syndication on what is now Spike TV. I LOVED that show when I was in college and it ran in syndication on FOX. (When it was in its first run, it wasn't on the three channels we got at my parents' house, so I had never seen it.) I found out that ST:TNG was on Spike at 8:00 and then another episode again at 11:00. Giddy with glee, I would watch the first Star Trek, then leave the TV on and do things around the apartment or talk on the phone until the next episode at 11:00.

You're like, "Lady, WTF does Star Trek have to do with WWE?!"

And I'm like, "Um, what is on Monday nights between 9 and 11 PM?"

Monday Night Raw.

While waiting for my next dose of Trek, I inadvertently got sucked into watching Monday Night Raw, which aired on the same channel, betwixt the Treks. I was, at first, uninterested. I'd go fold laundry or do dishes or something else while it droned on in the background. But now and again I'd catch bits of dialogue, pick up on a storyline, or see some incredible feat of in-ring mayhem and sit down and watch.

Now, you may not know this, but I love all things campy, funny, and buttkickin'. One of my favorite series of all time is "Xena, Warrior Princess" - I could go into the many reasons beyond the camp/humor/buttkickin that I love "Xena," but it would be a whole other blog post. The WWE has all of those elements in it, and it's ridiculously fun to watch. Ultimately, though, it was Edge that kept me hooked. He was dreamy, hilarious, and kicked some serious butt. *sigh* He also inadvertently introduced me to my husband, but that's another story. Thanks, Edge!

And that, my friends, began my slow reintroduction to WWE. I watch pretty regularly now, though there were a few years past that we didn't have cable and couldn't watch Monday Night Raw. Smackdown was still on our basic channels those years, though, so I did get a fix. Now we are back to full cable, with all WWE shows accounted for, and I'm starting to devour it all up again. And thanks to Netflix, I'm able to watch documentaries, behind-the-scenes, and pay-per-views past on DVD or download.

So ... yeah. That's the story of the WWE and Me in a nutshell. Keep that in mind as I blog future posts.

Onward!

Go King!

2011-04-01T12:40:00.004-04:00

Here's who I'm rooting for in the Cole vs. King match on Sunday. Jerry "The King" Lawler! My husband and I met him at Comic Con in San Diego last summer - he autographed the graphic novel we're holding here, as he did the cover art. Very cool!

The graphic novel, by the way, is "Headlocked." You can check out the comic HERE.

The Words Speweth Forth Onto The Page

2011-03-30T19:35:00.006-04:00

Greetings, Hazmat Fans!

So, Friday begins Script Frenzy, and I'm pumped! I have a great idea and I'm ready to get it on the page. It's going to be a challenge, as I am attempting to finish a rough draft of my book by the end of May, and now this script by the end of April. We have family visiting for a week during that time as well. And to make things nice and complicated for myself, This Here Blog is about to undergo a bit of a change.

I'm not sure how many of you Hazmat Fans follow my Twitter feed (off in the right column there, if you're interested) but I tweet a lot about Pro-Wrestling - usually while watching Monday Night Raw or Friday Night Smackdown, while eating dinner with my husband and cat. (The cat is a huge Rey Mysterio fan.) We get an east coast feed on our cable so we actually get to watch it earlier out here in the west, which is great - watch some butt-kickin' during dinner, then get on with the rest of the evening. I've had fun tweeting about it in recent weeks, but sometimes the character limit can't fully get my point across. And now that WWE is bringing back Tough Enough, which was a fantastic series when it originally aired on MTV back in the early days of this millennium, I'm going to have even more wrestling to have opinions about and want to share those opinions somewhere.

So guess what that means? Yup - Hazmat is going Pro; Pro-wrestling, that is. There will be a lot more blogging about wrestling and less bitching about my junk mail on these hallowed interweb pages in the coming weeks and months. I will still blog about all sorts of things, but expect the volume of wrestling posts to increase. Many of you who check out my blog might be like "eh, who cares about wrestling," - which I totally understand. But I promise you I will make it worth your read. Stick around, and stay tuned. I'll even reveal how I got into Pro-Wrestling in the first place - and it's a super geeky reason. (Any of you who actually know me will not be in the least bit surprised.)

Tough Enough airs this Monday, after Monday Night Raw. And this weekend is Wrestlemania.

And so it begins!

War of Words

2011-03-15T16:15:00.004-04:00

Greetings, Hazmat Fans!

As you can see by the little badge in the right column of the blog, I'm participating in 'Script Frenzy' this April. It's like NaNoWriMo that I did back in November, but in script form. I'm excited about this one - I have a great idea for an animated feature, and I'm looking forward to getting it on the page. And like NaNoWriMo back in November, we have company coming to stay with us for a week during the challenge. But unlike my November experience, I'm not making this idea up from soup to nuts as I go. I've been thinking about this idea for a while, so I'm hoping that makes a difference in my limited writing time.

Write on!

Shut up and fight!

2011-02-28T22:47:00.007-05:00

It's an hour and 45 minutes into WWE Raw tonight, and we've seen 2.5 matches. (Sheamus's match only counts for half a match.) Only 15 minutes left - there's a whole lot of gum flappin' going on and not much action. This seems to be happening a lot on Monday nights these days. We see a third of the roster and that third spends most of the time talking. I understand that the heavy hitters are saving their energy for Wrestlemania, and trying not to get hurt before then, but there are a lot of other guys back there that could be out wrestling right now. Wrestlemania is a month away - will we see any matches before then? The main event is finally on, with less that 10 minutes left. That brings the total to 3.5 matches for a 2 hour show. To that, I say MEH.

At least The Miz is Tweeting the main event. That's kind of funny. I gotta go check my Twitter feed ...

Beats Head Against Wall

2011-02-24T14:36:00.003-05:00

(Refer to Exhibit A and Exhibit B for previous discussions about this topic.)

Had another issue of 'Parenting: Early Years' show up in my mail today, after calling VistaPrint three times in the last six months to tell them to unsubscribe me from this "free courtesy subscription." I hope they recorded today's customer service call for posterity because it's the last time I'm going to be even remotely nice about it.

It makes me wonder how many companies are wasting time, money, and resources on these magical 'demographics' numbers, and how many of them completely miss the mark like in this particular instance. How many other people like me out there are being crapped on by statistics, and are they speaking up about it too? Maybe I'm the only one, though I find that hard to believe. And even if the majority rules, in this instance, that doesn't mean that we demographics-skewers should have to be quiet and just accept the junk mail and the irritating assumptions of companies out to make a buck.

But most importantly, how much waste is this creating? How much wasted ink and paper? How much wasted time? How much wasted effort? Is it really worth it?

Maybe this is why I ended up with a 'C' in Intro to Business.

Shameless Plug

2011-02-10T15:43:00.005-05:00

My Better Half is busy these days with his new hobby - exploring SoCal and writing about it. Check out his musings and adventures at his new blog, New Guy In Town, and follow him on Twitter: he's @818NewGuy. And while you're there, give him some suggestions on places to explore, people to meet, and stuff to do in Burbank and the vicinity.

He's nice. And he's dreamy!

Forget Hiking or Disneyland or Celebrity Home Tours!

2011-02-10T15:39:00.004-05:00

This is an ad that was on the side of my profile here on FB today. Is running up vertical walls really the best image they could find for the "365 best things to do in Los Angeles before you die" ad? Because I think there are a at least 367 cooler things to do out here than running up vertical walls.

Dear Demographics Mongers: I AM NOT A MOM!

2011-01-31T15:34:00.008-05:00

Remember THIS blog post from a few months ago, wherein I vented my frustration about my demographics being presumptive and how I found that, let's say, mildly annoying?

Well, it continues. Last week I received the latest issue of 'Parenting, Early Years' magazine. Even after calling and canceling my 'free complimentary subscription' just after writing that blog post. Not only did they not cancel my subscription, but it has my new address on it. Not forwarded, like the rest of my magazines; my actual new address, printed right on the front of it - 3000 miles away from my previous address. So maybe they did cancel my subscription, and this is a new subscription, and they're just stalking me. Either way, in the four months since that last blog post, I still don't have kids, and don't plan on having kids.

For the second time, I called the company that first signed me up for the magazine. (Whom I didn't call out in the previous blog post, but I will here: it was VistaPrint, whose products I love and use often.) I told them what a regular customer I am, and how I appreciate them thinking of me, but I expressed my displeasure with having to call a second time to cancel a magazine that I didn't even sign up for. They assured me that they would cancel the subscription for me. We shall see.

Today upon checking the mail, hoping my new California drivers license will finally be here after three months of waiting, I find that Gerber Life Insurance has started sending me junk mail that starts with the sentence 'Caring mothers like you know how important it is to plan ahead for your baby's future.' If by 'baby' you mean 'cat,' then we're on the same page. I called Gerber to request being removed from their mailing list, and they were very friendly about it, but said I could not have a policy for my cat. (Oh well, it was worth a shot.)

Every time I log into Facebook and go to my profile page, there are a series of ads that run down the side of the right column. For the last year, there has consistently been at least one ad about 'my baby' or 'being a mommy.' Facebook gives you the option to click out of the ad, and give them feedback so that they can 'find ads that better suit your interests.' And every time a baby ad comes up, I click out of it, and put in the 'other' category "I AM NOT A MOM! TAKE YOUR STUPID DEMOGRAPHICS AND SHOVE THEM!" I do it in all caps, just like that, but sometimes I change up the wording, to keep them guessing.

Am I going to be continuously barraged with baby mail now, just because I am thirty-something and married in Demographicland? I love my sisters' kids and my friends' kids, but I am cool with being the fun aunt and the fun mom's friend for now. Why does the Big Brother of Marketing think that my clock should be ticking? Why does society? Maybe not all of us want to be mommies. That's okay, you know. I like sleeping in, and traveling, and sleeping through the night, and not changing diapers, and that whole sleeping thing. After watching my sisters be mommies I can say I have a healthy respect for how hard mommies work, and how much joy they get out of it. But it's just not for me. Maybe someday I will change my mind, but as of right now, I hear no ticking. Clock is quiet. And I get to sleep in.

You know, Big Brother of Marketing, there are a lots of things about me that skew your all-knowing demographics. No matter what you think you have in your database about me, you can't figure me out. Really. Sure, I'm a thirty-something married female, but I love SciFi and Pro-Wrestling, not designer handbags and chick flicks. I'd much rather watch Ghost Hunters than Gilmore Girls, and I have never, ever seen an episode of Oprah. And if you asked me, I could name any Buffalo Bills player from the 1992-1995 seasons by number, but I can't name every character from 'Sex In The City.'

But don't worry, Big Brother of Marketing, there is one thing that fits my demographic with me that you can feel free to send me. I will give you this: I love HGTV, and I love interior design magazines. You send me those, and we will be best friends. Can we just go that route instead, and call it even? Please? If not for me, then for the environment. Think of all the paper, ink and envelopes wasted on your all-knowing demographics.

Save a tree. And leave my biological clock out of this.

Bag Lady

2011-01-20T15:32:00.007-05:00

My favorite purse, acquired for $7.99, on sale at Target.

I just read this article on Yahoo news. I usually don't click on stories like this, but for some reason, I did this time. Maybe it was The Universe trying to get me to blog again?

It's an article about "how the kind of purse a woman carries defines her" - because as you all know, we are all as humans (or at the very least, as Americans) defined entirely by the stuff we own.

According to the article, there's the Power Mom, the Eternal Prepster, the Upwardly Mobile Do-Gooder, and a few other monikers, all based on the size, colors, design, and price of their handbags. The cheapest of the bag-types listed was the 'Upwardly Mobile Do-Gooder' bag, at $60, and the next cheapest was $135. From there it went up through the hundreds, into the thousands. These offered dramatic and inspirational insights into the carrier's personality, such as 'she wears a lot of plaid' or 'this woman is obviously a label freak' - or even 'she doesn't get her hair blown straight.'

Reading an article like this, regardless of how stupid it is, one is no doubt going to look through each category and find the place where she is defined. I mean, can they really tell me who I am, simply by looking at my purse? Am I in some new category of life that I never even knew about? Some sub-species or side-genus of Handbagus Fashionisticas Femaleus that could have bearing on the very make up of my genetic self?

Sadly, I did not make the list.

I suspect it's because the two handbags I carry are from Target and were under $25. One is red and small and good for quick outings or shopping trips. The other is black and a little bigger, and can fit a notebook, a paperback and bottled water in it along with my sunblock, a reusable shopping bag, and the all-important wallet, phone, and lipstick. Oh - and hand sanitizer. Always important to have the hand sanitizer along.

Why would I not make the list? I imagine I'm not the only woman in America who doesn't carry a designer purse, right? Crap! How will I ever know who I am if I can't fit into an article like this and its clear defining of humans?!

Thankfully, I am pretty confident that my purse just says that I'm practical and have no hangups about 'who' I'm wearing or 'whose' bag I'm carrying. And that I shouldn't waste time on crap articles like this. And why is this article in the Yahoo Finance section?

Thanks for the blog fodder, anyway!

Time's Up - Pencils Down.

2010-12-01T17:06:00.003-05:00

Yes, NaNoWriMo is over for 2010, and as you may notice by my badge in the right column, I did not hit the 50,000 words. And you know what? I'm feeling pretty darn good about it. No, really - I am! Here's why:

- NaNoWriMo is 30 days of writing to produce and end result of 50,000 words and a finished rough draft. I ended on 20,115 words, but I had a week where I couldn't do much writing as we had company visiting from out of town. So basically, I wrote 20,115 words in 23 days. That's not too shabby. But that's not even why I'm feeling good about it.

- Some people go into NaNoWriMo prepared with an outline, character descriptions - you know, smart things that you'd do before you sit down to write a novel. I took a different approach to NaNoWriMo. I already have a novel I'm working on that has all of those things planned and plotted out for it. For NaNoWriMo, I wanted to really get into the concept of a soup-to-nuts novel. I went into it with a basic, one sentence premise for a novel. That was it. On November 1st, the gun went off and I flew out of the starting blocks. I came up with a couple of characters, and then I started writing. I wrote as I went, I worked out the story as it came to me. It was a completely different approach to writing than I've ever done. And you know something? I actually found a good story in there! It's rough and definitely needs some work, but it's actually pretty good. I now have six chapters of that story on paper, and just because November is over doesn't mean I'm going to leave it alone. I'm going to finish it the same way I started it - no plotting, planning, or fretting - just writing a story as it comes but without a time limit. There will be a rough draft of this book done in the not-too-distant future. So yeah, that's really cool! But it's not even the biggest reason that I'm happy with my NaNoWriMo experience.

- True, I wanted to hit that 50,000 mark. I did feel a moment of despair when I realized at 11:46 last night that there was no way I could write 30,000 words in fourteen minutes. But I'm actually quite proud of the 20,115 that I have written. And what is 50,000, anyway? How many novels are actually completed at 50,000 words? Is it just an arbitrary number? I'm only at chapter 6 in my NaNoWriMo story, and that's 20,000 words in. I already have half a novel written that's 11 chapters long so far and only about halfway done. So out of curiosity, I went to that file - which I have not touched since August, before our move to California and before I decided to do NaNoWriMo - and I looked at the word count. At chapter 11, that work stands at 60,954 words. So maybe the number is irrelevant.

So, yeah, I didn't hit the 50,000. But I did do some good writing, and I got into a writing groove again. Storylines and characters are playing out in my head while I do things like iron or do the dishes. Writing is back in the very matrix of my everyday life again, finally. And that is what I'm happiest about from this NaNoWriMo experience - that I can say I'm a writer and have something to show for it. Go me!

NaNoWriMo-tivation

2010-11-10T14:50:00.004-05:00

So it's week 2 of National Novel Writing Month, and I'm slowly increasing the word count. I'm finding the process to be less grueling, and more of a 'hurry up and get this done so I can work on other projects that I want to' - which is great. It's exactly why I wanted to do NaNoWriMo in the first place. If I can push myself to write a finished rough (really really rough) draft of a novel that I just thought of off the top of my head, then I can certainly get up enough gumption when NaNoWriMo is over to finish the two books I already have started - one has eight chapters, one has 11. I just keep getting bogged down in rewrites of what I already have because I want it to be good. So NaNoWriMo is, for me, the kick in the pants I need to force me to get a story on the page and then worry about revisions later.

By the end of November, I will have a rough draft of a completed novel. That's pretty darn cool to think about. Granted, it will be something that's stylistically pretty crappy, and will need much polishing, but the nugget of the story is there. And complete. That's rad. I think I might have me a little party to celebrate my crappy-but-finished first draft. A fun party! With cheese and wine! Mmmmmm cheese.

Ok, anyway, I have to get back to the other writing now. Just wanted to drop in a Hazmat update. Oh, and whassup, I even managed to blog again. Woah! Is our heroine going to keep this ball rolling? Is she really going to do this? Is she out of her freakin' mind? Tune in next week and find out!

All Write Now

2010-11-01T12:47:00.003-04:00

Greetings, Hazmat Fans!

Your Hazmat Headmistress has decided to participate in National Novel Writing Month this year, which starts today.

What, you say? But our fearless blogger can't even write more than one blog post per month. How the heck is she going to write a novel in one month?

Well, I suppose we will find out! In the right column of this blog you will see my word-count-o-meter, which officially monitors my progress in this monumental endeavor of the mind that I am about to embark on. So depending on how I do, you can either cheer me on, or laugh as I go down pathetically in flames. We'll go for cheering on, though, because it's nicer. And you don't really want to be meanies, now, do you?

So, wish me luck or tell me I suck, but it is November 1, and the starting gun has gone off. So here I go! And as an added measure of good faith, I will attempt to blog my experience along with my progress. Oh yeah, I'm feeling super ambitious about this project!

Tally Ho! Sally Forth! Onward!!

A Farewell to Beantown

2010-10-07T17:53:00.002-04:00

Dear Boston,

I’m leaving. I’m sorry to tell you this way, but it’s for the best. It’s not you … it’s me. It’s just not working out. I think I’ve outgrown you, and I need to move on. You’re just not what I need anymore.

It’s not anything you’ve done – in fact, without you in my life the last 4 years, I would not have grown into the person I am. I’ll miss aspects of you very much. I’ll miss walking around and seeing history at every turn. I’ll miss your old buildings and houses, your cobblestones and old graveyards, your harborwalk and your skyline. I’ll miss your inhabitants and their pride in their hometown, sports teams, and accent. (And yes, I’ll miss the accent. I grew up a New Kids fan – I find the accent endearing.) I feel privileged to have lived in Boston for four years, to have showed scores of our family and friends around, to have absorbed so much history and culture from the city and surrounding suburbs.

I’ll miss Arlington very much, especially The Costume Company, and The Book Rack, the Gail Ann Coffee Shop, Fitness First, and Menotomy Rocks Park. I’ll miss eating at Tango, and Not Your Average Joe’s, and Tryst, and Chilly Cow. I’ll miss walking on the Bike Path and saying “on your left” to the cyclists that fly by me and nearly take off my arm as they pass without a warning. I’ll miss yelling at those same cyclists who whiz by me on the sidewalk, past the big red signs in Arlington Center that say “No Bicycles on Sidewalks.” I will not at all miss commuting on the MBTA, except that now I will have to find something new to tweet about.

Most of all, I’ll miss the people I’ve met, lived near, and worked with in the Boston area. Outside of their vehicles, Bostonians are the nicest, friendliest people of any city I’ve lived in. They’re fiercely proud of their city, and well they should be. (They just drive like brain-crazed zombies on crack.)

But even with all that, it’s just not enough for me. I’ve always been a Californian at heart, even when I was a kid and had never been there. I always knew it was where I was destined to end up, and having previously lived in California and left, I now know that nothing else could ever fill its place. And so to California I return. I need the West Coast - the sun, the heat, the creative, laid-back atmosphere – it’s in my blood, and my heart, and my head. Nothing else will suffice, and though Boston has been a wonderful adventure, it’s not home.

So Boston, I hope you understand. I’ll always have a special place in my heart for you, and I hope that we can still be friends. I promise to never root against the Sox, to always root against the Patriots (sorry, folks, Bills fan to the core!) and to never take sides between the Celtics and the Lakers.

We’ll always have The Burren.

With Love,

The Hazmat Headmistress

Free Magazine Meltdown

2010-09-22T22:23:00.007-04:00

Today, when I got home from work and checked my mail, there were two issues of "Parenting, Early Years" waiting for me. I never subscribed to this magazine, but here it was, with my full name and address on it, like I would be waiting with bated breath for it to arrive in my mail. But more confounding than the mystery subscription is the subject matter of the publication - I am not a parent.

I flipped one open to the Masthead and found the number for subscription customer service and gave them a call. When I finally navigated my way through the automated menu to a human, she looked up my info and told me that I was subscribed automatically from an order I had placed on an online shopping site.

So the customer service representative gives me the number for the marketing company who handles subscriptions for the site I ordered from. So I call it - a bleak automated system that does not allow any talking to an actual human. My address and demographics were apparently shared by the online company to the marketing group, and that I didn't even need to click any boxes at the end of my order for this. Apparently, my subscription was a 'gift' and 'costs me nothing' and was a 'courtesy.'

Courtesy? Courtesy?! Let's think about this: Your asshole demographics analysts assume that because I am a thirtysomething, married female that I must have small children at home. Well fuck you very much, demographics mongers, but I don't have kids. And I don't want children, yet. (Because then I could not freely say 'fuck you very much' without worry of it being parroted by a toddler, among other far more reasonable reasons I don't want to be a parent yet.) It's bad enough people assume that I want to have kids just because I'm thirtysomething and married, when it's really none of their business what goes on in my uterus. I don't need my mailbox trying to send me hints too.

But further - what if I couldn't have children? What if it was my biggest wish, my hugest desire, and it was impossible for me, and you and your demographic marketing buttwipes are sending me this magazine assuming that I can? How about pouring battery acid into my eye sockets? Or stabbing me with rusty tools after my 10 year tetanus shot limit has run out and I haven't gotten a booster? That's about as nice as it would feel to someone struggling to procreate getting parenting magazines in the mail. Hey, prisoner chained to the wall and starving to death, let's dangle this amazing steak two inches too far away from you. I bet that doesn't show up on your numerical age-gender-marital-status printouts, does it?

Let's really think about this - I'm a thirtysomething married female. There are plenty of benign magazine subjects that you could have chosen from besides parenting. Chances are, you send me a fashion magazine or an interior decorating magazine, I'll eat that shit right up. And be less inclined to send you an angry letter, write an angry blog post, and call your 800 number all angry. And, by the way, lose you that subscription you forced on me.

I feel bad for that, because Parenting Magazine is, I'm sure, a fine publication. I've worked in the publishing industry for years, and I know how valuable a subscription is. I just don't think this marketing company is doing the magazine any justice by forcing it on people based on their demographics.

I gave the magazines to my sister, who is a thirtysomethibng mother of two. Maybe she'll subscribe, and the balance will be restored. Either that, or some online company will send her "SciFi Monthly" and we can trade.

Maya-pologies ...

2010-08-12T11:57:00.007-04:00

... at least, that's what Roland Emmerich should be saying to, like, everyone, for making "2012."

My husband and I watched it last night because it popped into our Blockbuster Online queue and, well, I should think the below screen shots of our running commentary on Facebook should serve as an apt review of the movie. (The only thing it was missing that would have completed the horrible, terrible, awful badness of the movie were shots of hapless whales rolling through the multiple tsunamis.)

Enjoy:

Stride and Seek

2010-07-01T15:25:00.008-04:00

I’ve started running again. Not from the law or from the truth, just wanting to get back into shape. When I was in high school I ran cross-country and track, all distance events. I’ve never been much of a sprinter, and the one field event I tried – long jump – I ended up spraining my back in the process. (Yes, it is totally possible to sprain your back, and it hurts like hell, I can tell you.) I played basketball for a few years in junior high and high school, but though my lay-up skillz were not bad, I wasn’t very aggressive on the court.

My days playing center bench in high school.

I was too timid to run up to someone and knock them down, steal the ball, and leave fingernail scratches on their arm in the process – that’s how a lot of our opposing teams played. I spent most of my basketball career making sure the bench didn’t move. My coach would take pity on me for the last 2 minutes of each half of the game and put me in – if we were losing and there was no hope of catching the score up. But distance running, that was something I could do, and I loved it.

We were awesome.

I was by no means the fastest. And for a time, I was certainly slowest. But once I hit my stride, I was usually somewhere solidly in the middle of the pack. I was even ok enough to be second leg on a relay team. And for the full 5 years I ran, our girls’ cross-country team was undefeated; I think I may have contributed to some of that a time or two, though others were by far the solid points-getters for the team. I didn’t enjoy track as much as cross-country. There was a certain Zen to running through woods and fields, with uphills and downhills and rocks and tree roots; it felt like more of a challenge than running in circles for three miles and trying to keep track of which lap you were on. I loved the earthy, muddy scent of the trail mixed with the woodsy pine and dried leaf smell of the course. Once you were out there on the course, it was you, your stride, and the runners ahead of you that you intended to pick off one by one as the three miles ticked on by.

It’s been several years since I’ve done any kind of running. I’ve tried a few times since high school to get back into it, each time whining and wheezing myself out of it. There is substantially more of me than there was back then, and things bounce and jiggle in ways that they never did when I was seventeen, which makes for all kind of psyching myself out. But over the last three weeks, I’ve been running again, and I seem to have found my missing stride. It started out as an experiment; I discovered, after doing the Relay For Life at our local high school track, that this school has one of the cool cushy tracks that our track team only visited – the kind that absorbs the shock of your footsteps and helps propel you forward, while going easy on your knees. (For those of you reading this who might have been on my track team, think Hornell or Campbell-Savona’s tracks.) I started telling my husband that these were always the best tracks to run on – I got all of my best times on the cushy tracks. (Our school had a cinder track, which was decidedly less cushy and absolutely not fun to fall and skin your knees on.) I told him offhandedly that, instead of one of our evening strolls, we should go down to the school’s track and try jogging on it. So on a whim, we did. And it wasn’t bad at all.

I started out with jogging a mile, with a substantial warm-up and cool-down walk each time, just to ease myself back into it. I decided that I would jog slow - slower even than I walk, just to get the rhythm of running and breathing back. It’s been 3 weeks of intermittent convincing ourselves to go to the track, but suddenly, the mile is becoming easier to do. So on to two miles! And other places to run! Last night, my husband and I walked up to a nearby park and ran the trails through the forest, and the joy of running cross-country flooded back to me. I forgot my pedometer, so I have no idea how far we ran in miles, but it was a good run with some substantial hills, and we ran at a good clip. I’m looking forward to finding more places nearby to run like that!

I’m not going to go ahead here and say that I can call myself a runner again; I’m wary of jinxing my rekindled enthusiasm for running, lest I talk myself out of it again. And I’m not going to commit to ever running races again, for fear that I won’t follow through. But I have to say, it feels really good to be back in my Nikes.

4 a.m. This Morning, Chirped The Bird of Insanity

2010-06-29T17:42:00.005-04:00

Ok, birds, I know the sky is getting lighter at 4 a.m. these days and all, but holy mother of God, could you please shut the hell up? This bird was non stop for an hour. AN HOUR. Imagine this, in high pitched angry squawking: "EEAAAGH!! EEAAAGH!! EEEEAAAAAGH!!" What the hell did this bird have to be so angry about? Seriously, it was pissed off. Some other bird must have gotten all up in its grill and it wasn't having any of it, and it wanted everything in the animal kingdom to know that it was mad as hell and not going to take it anymore.

It was just far enough away in a tree that I couldn't clearly see it or reach it with anything I could throw. But still close enough to annoy the ever-living crap out of me. It was as constant as an alarm clock, for a full hour. I don't know if birds breathe - I assume they have some sort of oxygen intake system but I can't remember my 10th grade biology right now. I'll Google it later. Anyway, if birds do breathe like we do, then this bird was like one of those musicians who practice circular breathing to keep continuous sound coming from their instrument. (Ok, well now that I've had to Google circular breathing, I might as well Google how birds breathe. (Oh, yeah! 10th grade bio is all coming back to me now ...) I totally get now why that bird didn't stop to take a breath - it didn't have to. So it just kept screaming.

I eventually got up and shut the window, pulling out the box fan that was keeping us somewhat cool with morning air. I knew this would mean we would swelter as the sun crept higher, but I needed to drown out that damn bird. But it didn't help.

So I put the iPod in its dock on to soothing New Age spa music. But alas, the bird chirped through it.

Next I put the fan up a notch to drown it out with white noise, and we needed more air anyway since I closed the windows. Still didn't help.

So I put on the "naturescapes" sound machine, set to rolling thunderstorm. STILL didn't help. That bird was bent on ruining my zzz's.

So, as a last ditch effort, I pulled out the foam ear plugs. I hate wearing these to sleep in. It's totally umcomfortable to sleep on my side with them in my ears, and once they're in, all I can hear is my own heart and lungs. And that, to me, is just freaky. I'm glad to know they're in there and working fine, but I don't need to hear them doing their thing. But guess what? I STILL HEARD THE FRICKIN BIRD!! It was muffled, it was in the way distance, behind my heartbeat and the thunder and the fan and my iPod, but it was still there. I think eventual frustration coupled with exhaustion helped me finally drift off, but I dread tomorrow morning, and the imminent return of the pissed-off avian.

Stories From The Fridge

2010-06-20T11:29:00.005-04:00

When friends and family come to visit, it is a true joy to open your home to them and share your bounty with warm and loving hearts.

According to DaysOfElegance.com:

In the day of genteel manners and formal introductions, the exchange of calling cards was a social custom that was essential in developing friendships. The custom of carrying calling or visiting cards began in France in the early 1800's. It quickly spread throughout Europe, and then became vastly popular in the United States, especially the New England area from 1840-1900. Calling cards were carried primarily by the "well-to-do" ladies who made a point to go calling on friends and family on a specified day of the week or month, depending on their location and proximity to neighbors. The gracious reserve of a simple calling card is a gentle reminder of one's presence, and the care poured into a finely crafted card is a welcome courtesy.

I'm not sure that calling cards themselves are much used in this day and age, but our home has it's own breed of calling card that people leave with us after their visits: Magnetic Poetry. We have four editions of Magnetic Poetry on our fridge; Regular, Genius Edition, Wizard of Oz, and the STA Travel set. With this odd mix of sets, our friends and family have left an abundance of modern-day calling cards on our fridge. Here is a sampling of their creative wit.

Never shake crass drunk woman.

Beneath a sanguine moon, the wicked munchkins cry-d for blood.

So droll you are, with your turgid sausages.

They elaborated together with zeal, like a thousand verbose miscreants caterwauling together.

Beat the lazy fluffy hippie.

Auntie Em's diggity purple butt is tantamount to a nefarious symphony of lust.

Manipulate my mellifluous moment.

Space dog absconds with raw man parts.

Scream: Me want house!

Veil of the delirious goddess: Chocolate time is gone - say in love with the TV.

I have a waxing urge to frantic-ly smear my down under drool over your enormously pendulous and luscious breasts. Cheers!

Melting beauty never boors summer penguins.

Monkey hair makes my winkie sweat.

Sing storm - remember, must always drink up.

Happy lollipop. Always American.

We love the mooning.

Elucidate salient question that could gall vapid woman.

Language over the bitter spring finger.

Sad kids produce ridiculous dreams of great Kansas.

Crazy Dorothy had a broomstick and somewhere to expunge all the obtuse wizards from.

No more festivals sadness. Come Munchkinland, me & you.

Peach & Puppy rainbows, love.

Needless to say ... our friends and family are an interesting bunch!

Beiber Pelt

2010-06-09T19:02:00.013-04:00

Justin Bieber. I just don't get it. I was a 13 year old girl once - I know all about boy band love. Hell, N'Sync just came on my iPod as I'm typing this! But this Beiber kid. I just plain don't get it. I even went to iTunes to check out his music, to give him the benefit of the doubt. And really, truly - I just don't frickin' get it! It's obnoxious! The most obnoxious New Kids song is like musical Shakespeare compared to the ear-curdling yipping that I heard from The Bieb. And what's with his hair? I can't help but imagine that 'do on other things.

Like, say, a goat.

Or a pineapple.

Or Kane.

Or an exercise ball.

Or Lindsay Lohan. (Pre-insanity.)

Or Max Rebo.

Or a Smurf.

Or a Magic 8-Ball.

Or a star-nosed mole.

Maybe I just need to be nine years old again? I don't know. For now, I guess I'll just stick to finding funny things to Photoshop his hair onto.

Pretty Pretty Please, Vince!

2010-05-07T21:05:00.002-04:00

Dear Vince McMahon,

If you were teasing us last week and don't plan on following through, then I might cry. Edge and Christian in the ring together, making nice, then OH! Fued! I love it. I do! Now don't let it peter out! Bring it to a crazy, long, drawn-out, Raw V. Smackdown feuding frenzy! As long as these two are in the ring together, feud or friend, I don't care - just follow through on this!

And if you feel so inclined to let it run its feud course until they are steel cage or TLC match or what have you, I say YEAH! GO FOR IT! And if then you decide that the WWE is lacking something since Shawn Michaels left (YAY!) and DX is no more, and maybe you want to get a beloved tag team back together to pep up the fans, and maybe you want to give us Edge fans who miss funny, ass-kicking Edge of Yore (Pre-Vicki, Pre-Lita) - I'm talking the Edge who gave us "You Suck!" for Kurt Angle and shaved his head - if you want to get some of that back for us Edge fans who stuck by him even through the long, confusing heel stage he's been in - well, dude, Vince, I for one would be grateful.

PS - Could you put some more women's shirts on the WWE Shopzone? Besides frickin' Diva stuff? I had to cut down a men's Edge shirt to fit and it still doesn't fit right. HELLO - untapped audience here! Milk us for money! Give us baby tees! Call Alyssa Milano - she's got some great stuff at NFL!

Thank you,

Female WWE Fan

A Friendly Reminder to Arlington Bicyclists

2010-05-05T21:13:00.005-04:00

Tonight I stepped out onto an Arlington sidewalk and nearly got plowed down by a dude on a bike. Then another dude blew by me and gave me crap for being in his way. A few weeks ago I got yelled at by a cyclist who was behind me on the sidewalk - he told me to move, I was walking too slow and he wanted to get by.

Bite me, all of you:

Would someone enforce this, please?
Thanks.

Flove

2010-02-19T15:59:00.004-05:00

Greetings, Hazmat Fans.

I know, I know. I've been away a looooong time. About as long as I've been away from the gym. (see previous post) Both of those things will be remedied in coming weeks, but first, I have a much more important post to do here.

I lost my Grandma Flo to Multiple Myeloma last weekend. She was a funny, warm, classy and short lady with a big heart, and it seems unfathomable to me that she is not in this world any more. She was the most loving person I have ever known, and she has left a legacy of that love in her family - one that we will pass on to our own children. Love is more important than anything else. I learned that from her.

I put together this slideshow as a small way to remember her, and I want to share it here, so that others can know how much she loved us, and how much we all love her still.

I miss you, Flove.

That's how I roll.

2009-08-31T22:26:00.004-04:00

I really need to get back to the gym.

Sole-less?

2009-08-11T22:23:00.003-04:00

Dear Ladies Who Were Sitting Behind Me On The Bus,

Yes, the bus driver was kind of a doofus, but he was nice and he meant well. You needn't have carried on in such a mean way just out of his earshot about how he was the town idiot. He drives your asses back and forth to Alewife so that you can save your gas money to spend on all those boxes of shoes that you kept prattling on about - the ones you buy one of each color and then hide them under your bed from your husband so he doesn't know you bought them. (I wasn't eavesdropping, you were freaking loud.) The bus driver spends his whole day combatting Boston drivers and shuttling all personality types, not speed-dialing QVC. I think he gets a freebie if he has to pause the bus before leaving the station so he can go back inside for two seconds to get his sunglasses - assuring that he can drive into the evening sun safely while taking us all to our destinations.

You should be kicked in the shins with those stupid pointy Jimmy Choos you were so proud to brag about.

So there.

Natural Cheese.

2009-08-10T18:24:00.008-04:00

Here's a little something I found at the grocery store:

Now, is it just me, or does it strike you as odd that this is being marketed as Natural Cheese? How grossly preservative-happy are we as a culture that Kraft has to promote a special line of cheese that hail the virtues of a food that's supposed to be natural in the first place?

Here's the shpiel from the Kraft Web site:

Kraft has Reinvented the Wheel

Introducing the scrumptious new standard in Cheddar. Our Kraft Natural Cheddar Cheese Made with 2% Milk now tastes just as delicious as regular Kraft Cheddar. Enjoy the new standard in Cheddar on a cracker or in your favorite recipe.

I TOTALLY think they should market all their other cheese as Unnatural cheese - it would be far more entertaining and less pathetic.

Where did the Hazmat go?

2009-06-24T18:21:00.006-04:00

Hello Interwebs, I'm still here!

I've been very busy of late, despite my unemployment. I have been using my unexpected free time productively, and besides looking for work, I have nearly completed a draft of a book that I've been writing! Yeah, I know - woah! I'm also working on a screenplay, because I'm a Gemini, and we can never have just one project on the table, now, can we? So that's where I've been writing, whilst my blog atrophies. I apologize!

Here are some things I've been thinking about in the meantime, having put notes in the mental filing cabinet for future bloggage.

First of all, dear Massachusetts drivers, might I just say that you all need to stop driving as if you are blindfolded in bumper cars while overcaffeinated and being attacked by killer bees. I'm not kidding. What is wrong with you? It's an epidemic! I nearly saw an old lady turn into roadkill the other day because the beeoytch in the BMW SUV on her cell phone was doing 60 in a 30 and blew through the crosswalk as if the old lady in the hot pink rain slicker was just a speed bump. She had to have seen the hot pink old lady - you could not miss her on a cloudy dark day in that rain slicker! But potential manslaugter was not as important to this driver as getting to the red light a block away 2 seconds faster. Everyone in this state needs to chill the eff out while driving. Nothing is that important to get to unless it involves a hospital emergency. And speaking of, pull the eff over when you see emergency vehicles with sirens and lights coming in your direction. I can't believe I have to tell you this! Have you no souls?

Now that I have my rant off my chest, I feel better. Thanks!

I got a bike for my birthday - that was rad! Thanks Bryan and Mom & Dad! I love it. I named it Berta. (I name things, so what? My car is Megara. My husband's car is Fizzgig. My computer is, uh, Mac.) I am too afraid of the drivers mentioned above to take it out on actual streets here, but luckily, I live near a bike path, so I have been tooling around on the bike path with it and it's great fun! (Speaking of the path, might I remind all you dog owners of this. If I hit a poo slick on my bike and eat pavement, I will find you.)

And saving the best for last: In big, exciting, awesome and totally freakin' rad Hazmat news, I am going to Comic-Con in San Diego this July! Expect a fun and anecdotal summary of my total geek experience here on Hazmat!

I'll be back to write more soon, promise. It won't be months this time. Might not even be weeks. I might even write tomorrow. You don't know!! So stay tuned!!

Razor Burned!

2009-03-28T11:45:00.003-04:00

Today I ran out of shaving gel and razors - of course, the day it's nice out and I want to wear capri pants. So I borrowed a spare razor of my husband's, and some of his face shaving cream. And I discovered something ...

Ladies: the man is trying to hold us down.

I got the closest, best shave on my legs of my life, and no nicks! Even on my shins! Boys, try shaving your shins sometime. Better yet, try it with strawberry-scented shaving crap and a Shick - even the sound "shick" sounds like the slicing of flesh by a blade. Shick. Shick!

The Gillette Mach 3 and Gillette Fusion Hydra Gel are AMAZING. And marketed to men. WTF? How different is shaving under your chin from shaving the back of your knees? Or your shins? Or that soft spot behind your ankle bone that I have countless shaving scars on? Seriously - I have seen the light and I will not go back. The Venus razor has nothing on this Mach 3. And I don't need my shaving cream to smell like raspberries or mango or mountain rain - I just want to be razor burn and sliced-skin free. And I am.

So ladies - join the revolution!! Just in time for spring!! Don't let the man keep you down - steal his razors and be free!!

I'm a Completer!

2009-03-27T13:59:00.005-04:00

Well, folks, today is the last day of the BufBloPoFo. I have blogged for 2 weeks straight! Whew! I need a vacation! This is always a fun experience, both in the challenge of writing something potentially interesting every day, and in reading the posts of the fellow participants. I look forward to BufBloPoFo 2010.

This is the part where I say I will try and keep up my blog writing as frequently as I have been during this blog marathon; but if you look at my track record after last year's BufBloPoFo, you'll see that it didn't quite work out that way. So instead this will be the part where I say I will try to blog more than I did last year. That's fair, right?

Anyway, fellow BufBloPoFo participants, it has been fun! Keep in touch! And see you next year!

Gas, Revisited

2009-03-26T09:43:00.010-04:00

BufBloPoFo Topic for Day 13

Link to whatever you posted exactly one year ago

and give your readers an update on that topic.

Last Year On This Day I was enduring someone else's intestinal emissions on the train during my commute. What has changed since then? Well, I don't have a job, so I don't have a commute. But on the plus side, I don't have to smell other people's gas on the train anymore.

Dinner Party

2009-03-25T21:04:00.002-04:00

I only have a moment to post for today, but upon watching the season 2 finale of The Tudors, I have decided my post for today will be in answering of my own question posed to Amanda of Popcorn a few days ago, which was:

If you were hosting a dinner party and could invite 5 celebrities or people of note, who would you invite, and what would be on the menu? And what do you think the conversation would go like? (You can use a time machine, if that helps.)

Upon watching two full seasons of The Tudors, and having read the many books I have on them, my answer to my own question would be this: I would invite Henry VIII, two of the world's top geneticists, and two of the world's top fertility experts. And I would have these brilliant minds explain to Henry VIII how a son or daughter comes to be, and which parent is responsible for the sex of the child. And then let him think about that. Without supper.

At this moment ...

2009-03-24T18:03:00.006-04:00

BufBloPoFo 09 Topic for Day 11

1. Take out your cell phone.

2. Turn it around and take a picture of yourself

AS YOU ARE RIGHT THIS SECOND NO CHEATING.

3. Post that pic and describe it. Where are you? Why are you wearing that?

Ok, well, I used my Webcam because I am broke and I didn't want to spend the 25 cents to send the photo from my cell phone to my e-mail. Here's the picture:

At this very moment, I am finally sitting down after a long whirlwind of a day of job searching and running around doing errands and hitting the gym and donating things to charity and walking another 3 miles after the gym (I know, overachiever) and helping people with computer problems and brainstorming.

Phew!

It's 6:08 and I just got home, and I have crashed on the couch next to my cat who is watching dogs and their owners go by on the bike path outside of our living room window. As you can see, he looks thrilled to have his picture taken. (Maybe I blew his cover with the dogs?) I'm waiting for Bryan to get home so we can have dinner. I am so hungry I could eat my own arm right now. But then, how would I blog?

Why am I wearing that - what? Sunglasses on my head? And a tan hoodie? Because the glorious sun was out today. If only the wind chill would have vanished it might have actually been nice out. Yeah, a wind chill. In springtime. Oh, how I miss SoCal!

Neeed .... foooood ... soooooooon .....

Those People

2009-03-23T11:21:00.005-04:00

Today's topic:

BufBloPoFo day 10: tell me who inspires you. Who is your hero?

I don't have one specific hero. I'm inspired by a lot of people; My parents, because they are such good people, so loving and smart and dynamic. They are people to strive to be like. My sisters, who have both dedicated their lives to improving the quality of others lives. My husband, who is a dedicated journalist in an industry that is struggling to keep up with the times. My friend Shelly inspires me - her very presence is full of love and life. She strives to educate her community and world that Pagans are not what the common social stereotype makes them out to be. My friend Meghan, who saves little lives on a daily basis and is full of drive and determination and a great sense of humor. My friend Beth, who has endured a lot of sadness but still seeks her dreams with a smile, and saves animals along the way. My friend Brian, a leukemia survivor who is more full of life than anyone I know, and is an incredible writing talent.

This is just a small list - there are so many people in my life who have inspired me that I couldn't possibly name them all here. To me, anyone who has a streak of determination to overcome something - anything - difficult for them, and better themselves and the world around them - that inspires me. We aren't all put on this planet just to cloister ourselves away to await glory in Heaven. We're here to learn, to test ourselves, to explore our world and do our part to help out. I think if people would stop focusing on what makes us all different, and think instead about what we all have in common, this world would not be so full of strife. Call me an idealist, but really, would you choose hate over love if it were coming your way?

And since you're reading this - be a hero and click that purple link box on the upper right of this page. It will take you two seconds, promise.

Most Embarrassing Moment

2009-03-22T11:20:00.004-04:00

Yesterday's blog topic was a great bringing together of BufBloPoFo'ers. We BufBloPoFo'ers visit each other's blogs throughout the fortnight, and then find ourselves revisiting these blogs throughout the rest of the year. Yesterday's assignment, to blog about the blog below you in the blog-roll, offered us the opportunity to get to know our fellow BufBloPoFo participants a little better. The blog above mine in Royal Toybox's blog roll is Phoeby and her Friends - a smart, funny, fantastic blog by Esther, who I haven't met but she seems totally rad. And it is also great to know that someone appreciates my blogging of the total goofy geekery of my husband and I, and reads my rants about rudeness in public places. It's great to make your blog acquaintance!

As per today's official BufBloPoFo topic, she has asked a question for me to answer: What is my most embarrassing moment?

That's hard to say. I mean, I'm someone who has no problem donning a Viking helmet for any occasion, or dressing like a pirate and romping around in public. I am kind of a ham, and I'm a big kid, and I love to make people laugh. As long as I'm doing something funny, like improv or acting or wearing some sort of costume, I can do pretty much anything (short of wardrobe malfunctions - I don't go there) without getting embarrassed.

When I do get embarrassed is when I am just being me, out of costume, and put my foot in my mouth. I tend to think something hilarious, and then have it totally translated wrong by the time it becomes spoken word. It happens a lot. My mind works faster than my vocal chords, and usually I have about ten thoughts from point A to point B, but only Point B comes out as an actual sentence. So I often come off either scatterbrained, random, or irrelevant. Sometimes, it even comes off as offensive. Really, I've just thought faster and farther ahead in the conversation than the group, but I haven't shown my work.

Hope that's a sufficient answer! Thanks for the question!

Sunday Sunday Sunday!

2009-03-22T10:43:00.004-04:00

Today is a rare day where we have nothing planned, no errands to run, no reason to leave the apartment. Today I will likely finish my spring cleaning - I have been hauling things out of closets and storage spaces and taking them to the Salvation Army. Sometime this week will be my second run to the drop-off bins.

I have been making a great effort to simplify our lives more. We don't need a lot of the stuff we have - most of it is stuff that we have each dragged around with us since leaving home, or collected as hand-me downs. I've made great progress with the closets - the guest room closet you can actually walk into at this point, and it's not supposed to be a walk-in. I'm moving on to the hallway closet today.

It's nice to know there's not a mess behind the closet doors, under the bed, in the kitchen cupboards, in bins and baskets tucked away for storage here and there. I've had it with clutter, and especially with dusting clutter. Dusting is an Olympic sport in this apartment - I have never lived in a dustier place, and that's saying something, since one of my apartments in California had louvered windows and was right next to the 134 freeway.

I think it's more than just spring cleaning that has got me fired up to de-clutter my life. It probably has something to do with having the economy be out of control, and being unemployed. I feel, by simplifying my surroundings that I am taking charge of something that is within my control. I can't don my Viking helmet and go kick the asses of AIG executives (well, I suppose I could, but I'm not really keen on the idea of having a criminal record.) And I haven't been able to just make a job magically materialize, though I have been trying my darndest. But I can take my own place in this world and have it make sense. I've also been exercising a lot more, and doing yoga. I've been cooking healthier foods from scratch instead of preservative and high-fructose-corn-syrup-laden 'easier' foods. I battle the crazy recession and unemployment stress and depression by doing what I can. And the stuff I purge from our closets and dressers might go to help someone else who is struggling in this economic climate. And hopefully, like the turning of winter to spring, the economy will start to warm up again soon.

Hey! The sun just came out as I wrote that!

Greetings, Amanda of Popcorn!

2009-03-21T10:44:00.009-04:00

Today's topic for blogging over at the Royal Toybox, our fearless leader for the BufBloPoFo, is this:

BufBloPoFo 09 Topic for Day 8

Alright, enough of this lazy stuff, time to get those creative juices flowing. Take a look to the right over there and you’ll see a list of the “BufBloPoFo 09 Participants”. It’s pretty, isn’t it?!? Look at them all! Okay, now find whichever blog is below yours and talk about that dude. If you know them, tell us how you met. If you don’t know them, talk about something you read on their site. Whichever it is, end your post by asking that person a question. (That last part maaaaaaay be important later on...)

So, the person whose blog is below mine is Amanda, and her blog is Popcorn. I've never met Amanda, I don't think, but upon reading back through her blog posts, I think we actually have a lot in common. I know Mike (of the Royal Toybox, the great bringer-together of Buffalo Bloggers) through my husband, who is the Buffalonian of the two of us. (I actually grew up in the Southern Tier of Western New York, but I grew up a Bills Fan, so that makes me somewhat Buffalonian, right?) I married into Buffalo, and as such, have met lots of wonderful Buffalonians. I'm not sure, in all of the Buffalonian get-togethers I have attended, that I have ever met Amanda of Popcorn ... if I have, Amanda, forgive me, as my memory is not so great unless it's for random movie quotes or stories from my childhood. But I noticed that one of your BufBloPoFo posts was about how you forget things, so I think we understand each other on that. I also noticed that your three top things are totally in line with mine right now - though I ended up blogging about cartoons last Saturday because my attention span is so OOH LOOK! A butterfly! and therefore so are my blog posts.

I am supposed to ask you a question (Mike hinted at its future importance that we ask our blog-buddy a question) but I'm going to ask you TWO because I am an overachiever, and I'm a Gemini so I can never do any one thing thanks to my dual nature. (For example - ask me what my favorite color is and I will tell you red - and green.)

Question 1: If you were hosting a dinner party and could invite 5 celebrities or people of note, who would you invite, and what would be on the menu? And what do you think the conversation would go like? (You can use a time machine, if that helps.)

and

Question 2: Have you ever tried making popcorn with peanut oil instead of vegetable or olive oil? If not, try it - it makes the popcorn all the more delicious. My aunt introduced me to it - I started making my popcorn that way and I haven't gone back.

Nice to meet you, Amanda of Popcorn! Hope you have a great day!

There's No Place Like Home

2009-03-20T10:19:00.007-04:00

I was too tired to muster much last night about the topic put forth at the Royal Toybox for yesterday's BufBloPoFo. But since today we get a freebie, I'll make up for it here, but with a twist. We're supposed to blog about our first home away from home. But I am in a unique position this week, so I am choosing to blog, instead, about the home I grew up in. You see, my parents, who are retiring from maaany years of teaching this June, put my home of 33 years up for sale on Monday.

My parents are avid hikers - they are both Adirondack 46'ers, and they love the mountains so much that they named me after the tallest peak in the Adirondacks. (Mt. Marcy!) After well over 30 something years of teaching high school, they both are moving up to the mountains so that they can spend their well-deserved retirement in the beautiful Adirondacks. Living in the mountains has always been their dream, and it's a wonderful thing that they can finally do so. I am very excited for them, and I know it is just time for them to move on. Our house is cozy and warm and full of memories, but it is far too crowded now that we are all married and my sister has offspring. They need a more spacious layout. And more than one shower.

Still, even knowing how happy they will be, and how right for them this move is, I can't help but feel a little bit heartbroken. Losing this house and the quaint valley it sits in is like losing a family member. Every Christmas there, every snow fort built in the yards, every summer volleyball game or campfire in the back yard ... they are all, after the house is sold, confined to memory, photos, and videos. I'm a little sad that I won't get to watch my nieces and nephews (and maybe, faaaar in the future from now, my own kids) play in our secret "echo base" fort in the neighbor's orchard, or ride their bikes up and down the driveway pretending to be CHiPs. (Ok, maybe our progeny won't be as into CHiPs and my sisters and I were, but still.) I know there are She-Ra toys buried in the silt in the stream behind our house - the scrap-wood mansions we built them are still embedded in the hillside, though overgrown with weeds and saplings now. I know somewhere over the bank behind the garage are the shredded remains of a Barbie and the Rockers Derek doll that my dad accidentally hit with the lawn tractor. And I know, because I am not the only one who has seen him, that our family cat Buster, who died in 1999, still walks through the house from time to time.

I liken this mixed emotion I have about my parents' move to a breakup; it sucks, and your heart feels broken, and you can't help but think about all the good times. But with a breakup comes moving on, and discovering new things and new happy occasions. And new memories yet to be made. My memories of home are golden, and warm, and happy. But so are my visions for my parents' future in the mountains. And as this cycle comes to it's full turn, the next one begins, and holds endless possibilities.

But that room over the front stoop will always be my room.

Sleepytime

2009-03-19T22:23:00.004-04:00

I just realized the day is drawing to a close and I haven't blogged yet. But alas, I have downed my mug of sleepytime tea and I am drowsy and ready for bed. Too tired to form cohesive sentences. So instead, enjoy this wonderful tidbit of interwebby goodness, and I will catch up with a more thinky post tomorrow.

Here's a funny story about Sha-Na-Na that my mom told me - I don't remember the actual occurrence, because I was really little (some time in the late 70's.) I LOOOOOVED Sha-Na-Na. I watched it religiously and would dance to every musical number on the show. I was a huge fan of Bowser (the guy with the deep voice.) Well, as kids do, I humiliated my mom at K-Mart with a simple kid-like statement ... we were in line at the checkout, and there was a big, muscular woman in front of us with greasy hair. And I pointed at her and said, loudly and with great glee - "Look Mom!! It's Bowser from Sha-Na-Na!"

The woman was not nearly as thrilled to be Bowser as I was!

Goodnight, everybody!

Wednesday Night Martini Madness!

2009-03-18T21:39:00.004-04:00

Perhaps you read Bryan's blog about our Wednesday Night Shenanigans?

Well, it's true. Meghan, my neighbor, is here, and we decided to experiment with some drink concoctions while watching America's Next Top Model. Why? Because we're fierce. That's why.

Our first experiment tasted great but looked like toilet. It was black cherry vodka, vanilla vodka and ginger ale poured over a drizzle of chocolate sauce. We called it Black Cherry Bike Path.

Our second drink was a mixture of ginger ale, gin, mango malibu, and maraschino cherry (juice and cherry) and we call it the Cherry Velure. (Because Meghan is wearing the most awesome burgundy velure track suit I've ever seen tonight.)

A drink and a half into Martini Madness night, We aren't so much drunk as completely silly, thanks to the Photo Booth program on my mac. Here's how it degenerated:

Quotes from the Couch

2009-03-17T20:27:00.003-04:00

Around our household, witty words abound. What can we say - we're both writers. And we're both odd ducks. And we both think we're hilarious. And we're probably not as funny as we think we are. We keep a quote book to record these witty moments. Since today's BufBloPoFo topic is to brag about something that isn't a huge life event, and since my husband just said something hilarious, I guess I am bragging about our accidental wit. So, here are some great quotes from the Mahoney household.

Bryan, to Marcy: "You're more fun than cardboard."

"It couldn't even read! And it was a SPECIAL car!" - Marcy, RE: Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

Bryan, playing video games: "We're getting our asses handed to us on a plate. On a platter. On a royal platter! On a silver platter!"

Bryan: "Now, do you suppose all those ships are on a slave circuit? Because they wouldn't all be able to go into hyperspace at the same time like that."

Marcy: "I'm trying to decide who's the bigger dork; you for asking that question, or me for understanding it."

"That place always smelled like poop, halitosis, and salisbury steak." - Marcy RE: Nursing Home

Marcy: "I will kick'em in the nuts."

Bryan: "What if they're all girls?"

Marcy: "Then I'll kick'em in the she-nuts."

Bryan: "Where are their she-nuts?

Marcy: "If you're a she you know where your nuts is."

Marcy: "Get the quote book ready - cuz I'm a drunkin'!"

Bryan, to Marcy: "Are you fresh off the cute truck?"

"Holy crap! C3PO answered the phone!!!" - Bryan, on the phone with the Boston Museum of Science

Marcy, to Bryan: "Why you gotta be a poop and stink like that?"

Bryan, after he sneezes: "Aough! Gross! What is that - chicken?"

Marcy: "Wouldn't you just love to, like, hear the elves of Lothlorien throw down the shizzle?"

Bryan: "WOW! That was manly! That burp had hair on it!"

Marcy: "I got caught in a downpour and now I'm drenched!

Bryan: "Is my grill okay?"

Marcy, to Bryan: "Pull up your pants while you make dinner." (pause) "You know, I shouldn't have to tell you that."

Bryan: "Guinness does everything! It does my math homework for me!"

Marcy, to Bryan: "Oh God! Your breath smells DEAD! It smells like poop cheese!"

Bryan: "We're just two geeks trying to make our way in the world."

Step By Step

2009-03-16T20:16:00.006-04:00

Today's topic over at the Royal Toybox for the BufBloPoFo is for me to tell you Step by Step how to do something. So that's just what I'm going to do - tell you - Step by Step.

Oooh baby.

Gonna get to you giiiiiirl.

That's right - you know what I'm talking about.

Step 1: We can have lots of fun.

Friday, April 4, 2008, I blogged about THIS. YES, the New Kids were reuniting! So giddy was I that I called my best girl blockhead Karen and we pinky swore that we would go to see them in concert. I was never allowed to go to a NKOTB concert when I was a teen - my parents seemed to think I'd get crushed in a stage rush or something. So now that I had the chance as an adult, I was not going to miss it!

Step 2: There's so much we can do.

This summer, the tickets went on Sale. Karen was in charge of getting them because she had the magical AMEX card that would allow us access to different perks than just your average card user. MAGICAL PERKS. Seriously - Karen managed to be one of the 100 people who got the super awesome backstage meet and greet package for the show. MEET. AND. GREET. Do you realize the importance of those three words? Not only were we going to the show, but we had guaranteed seats within the first 10 rows, and we got to - I will say it again - MEET AND GREET the New Kids before the show. (Preteen squealy scream in 3 .. 2 .. 1 ...)

Step 3: It's just you and me.

Karen flew into Boston for the concert - because, hey - it's the New Kids home turf and I live right here. We knew that seeing them in Boston would be the most awesomest of anywhere. My husband was greatly relieved that he didn't have to be involved in any New Kids shenanigans, and stayed at home watching Smackdown that night instead. So Karen and I got to the Boston Garden and were shuffled into the restaurant there for drinks, snacks, and the MEET AND GREET. We were in a room of 100 other New Kids fans - 97 women, two guys, and a kid. We snacked and drank our complimentary two glasses of wine while we waited for the 'Kids to arrive.

And then, they did.

Ohmigod.

Step 4: I can give you more.

Seriously. We were in the same room as the New Kids. I was 32 years old going on 13, only without the braces and the bad perm. And Jordan Knight was 20 feet away from me. They split us up into groups of 10, and each group got a few minutes to go into a corralled off area with the New Kids and, you know, MEET AND GREET. Then, they would take a big group photo and usher you out so the next group could come in. We were group "G," so we were early on in the alphabet, and our turn came up quickly. Karen was inarticulate as we inched closer to the roped off corral that the 'Kids waited in. I just kept saying "Oh my god." And then, they opened the ropes to group G.

The first thing I thought was that Jordan was the last one in the line and I had to get to the end of the line. The second thing I thought was "Ow." Karen had a death grip on my arm and was beelining for Donnie. She let go of me as soon as he held out his arms to her for a hug. I hugged Danny, and then turned around and Joe was in front of me so I hugged him. I told him it was my first New Kids concert and I was so excited to see them and he said "Where the hell have you been?" Then I turned around and Donnie was facing me, so I gave him a big hug and thanked him for being awesome. I was just about to turn to Jon, who was next in line, when the bodyguard Robo told everyone to line up for the picture. So we did. Here it is!

That's Karen in the New Kids sandwich between Donnie and Joe.

And that's me next to Jon and three feet from Jordan ...

A moment after the picture was snapped, Robo announced that we needed to move out so the next group could come in. But there was still three feet between me and where Jordan stood, and I hadn't gotten to meet my favorite New Kid yet! He was the poster plastered all over my wall when I was a teen. He was the one who would make me sigh wistfully when I would hear them sing or see them on TV. He was also unbelievably good looking in person - he is handsome in pictures, but let me tell you, they don't do him credit. WOW. And I was not leaving until I got my hug. He must have seen the panic on my face because he motioned me over to him and gave me a big hug. All I could say was "Oh My God." And he started cracking up! At least I made him laugh. Then we were shuffled out and went back to our tables on the promise that they would walk around to each table for individual pictures after all the groups had gotten through.

Well, Donnie and Joe did, anyway. The rest of the guys left to go get ready for the show. So we did get some individual pictures with these two. Notice the ridiculously giddy goofy looks on our faces! Holy crap, we are touching Donnie and Joe!!!

Step 5: Don't you know that the time has arrived?

So, after our MEET AND GREET, Karen and I went and found our seats ... 3rd row, almost center! And finally - almost half a life since the first time I wanted to see them in concert, I got to see the New Kids. And it was AWESOME.

Here are some pics I took at the show:

Random Radio Experiment

2009-03-15T12:47:00.004-04:00

Boston radio stations, with the exception of WBCN, pretty much suck. I find myself listening to Rochester stations like WXXI or The Buzz, or Los Angeles' KROQ on my computer instead of just having the radio on these days. But there is one all-purpose station that I put on if I just need random background noise, and on weekdays, it has the added benefit of being commercial-free between 9 am and noon. That station is Mike FM, and it truly is random. The only downer is that I run the risk of hearing an occasional Shania Twain song. *shudder.*

So one day over the summer I had the radio tuned to Mike FM. And I began to write down the first full sentence of every song that came on the radio for about an hour and a half. I was curious to see if it ended up telling a story. I did this with the intent of blogging it, and then forgot about it, and then found the paper yesterday while cleaning out a cupboard in our home office. How serendipitous during BufBloPoFo season! So, here is the (admittedly kind of lame) random radio first-line-of-every-song experiment:

(And see how many of these songs you recognize from the first sentence ...)

Well, I heard him on the TV, preachin' 'bout the promised land. We're not scared to lose it all, security throw through the wall. I know it's late. Take a look at my girlfriend - she's the only one I got. My friend the communist holds meetings in his RV. Hey little sister - what have you done? I was travelin' down the road, feelin' hungry and cold. Zwei, drei, vire, one two three, it's easy to see, but it's not that I don't care so. I have a mansion, forget the price. Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road. The heat is on - it's on the street. Golden years, gold, wop wop wop. We do it all, everything, on our own. A white light on the stormy ground. Turn the beat around, love to hear the passion. Sweet dreams are made of these - who am I to disagree? She grew up in an Indiana town with a good lookin' mama who never was around. Those times I waited for you seemed so long ago. Wild thing - you make my heart sing. Gimem a word, gimme a sign, show me where to look, tell me what will I find? Don't think of me as unkind - words are hard enough to find. I want to break free! Well I don't know where I'm going, but I sure know where I've been. She give me money when I'm in need. The Salvation Army band played and the children drank lemonade. You must understand how the touch of your hand makes my pulse react.

So? Is there a story there? You tell me!

BUFBLOPOFO is ON!

2009-03-14T11:21:00.005-04:00

Ladies and Gentlemen, Hazmat Fans everywhere:

Today begins the 2nd annual BufBloPoFo!

For the next two weeks, I will be blogging every day. I can't promise it will all be groundbreaking work, but I can promise that if I will write every day. Hell, last year I managed, and I had the flu for most of the two weeks! (For last year's entries, see HERE. You have to go to the bottom entry and read upwards since that's how Blogger organizes things for me. The Bill Cosby entry is still my favorite!)

So today's BufBloPoFo (this is really hard to say out loud, by the way. Try it!) topic is supposed to be "What are the three most important things in your life right now?" Well, I was going to blog about my hopes and dreams, but horrible Saturday morning cartoons has taken the wind out of those sails. So guess what my topic is?

Bryan and I cut back to the most basic of basic cables to save some money. We get 14 channels - 5 network, 2 Spanish, 2 home shopping, 3 different PBS's, a channel in German, and the golf channel. Of all of these channels, the CW is the only one that plays Saturday morning cartoons. And of all the cartoons we see on the CW Saturday mornings, only one of them - Ninja Turtles - is a show NOT based on a trading card/internet game. Chaotic, Huntik (worst theme song ever!) Yu-Gi-Oh something or other, Dino-something or other - they are all BAD, with lines like "You think you have won, but I throw my fire demon monster card in combination with my water spirit tsunami card and you will pay!" But we watch them because there are no other cartoons on our channels.

So what happened to the major networks having great cartoon line-ups? Growing up, my sisters and I only had CBS, NBC, and ABC on our TV. Cable didn't come out as far as we lived and my parents didn't get a DSS satellite until I was in college. (That means I never got to watch the Simpsons, MTV, Star Trek, Nickelodeon, Married with Children, In Living Color ... you get the idea.) If we saw You Can't do That on Television or USA Cartoon Express, it was only a couple times a year when we went to stay over at Grandma & Grandpa's house. But we never felt as if we suffered, because the major networks had awesome cartoons and shows - Smurfs, Gummi Bears, Muppet Babies, Pee-Wee's Playhouse, the Nintendo Cartoons, Snorks - you name it, it was all on the major networks. And of course, so was our favorite Saturday morning show of all time: Saved By The Bell. (Not a cartoon, but had to give it honorable mention!)

So I'm grumpy that if I turn to CBS, NBC, or ABC on a Saturday morning, it's an infomercial, a news show, or a re-run movie. It's really sad! Thank the gods for He-Man on DVD.

Ooh - sorry, gotta go - Kamen Rider Dragon Knight is on.

CRAPTASTIC.

2009-03-13T09:41:00.007-04:00

See this?

It's DOG CRAP. I went for a walk on the Minuteman Bike Path yesterday, which was littered - and I mean steaming piles strewn everywhere - with dog crap. THANK YOU, person whose dog's anus is responsible for destroying my Nikes. There is no way to get the smell out, either. I walked through every remaining snow bank I could find trying to clean off the shoe, scraped it on rocks and tree roots, but to no avail. I live in an apartment, don't have a hose, and I'm not throwing my shoes into the same washer that cleans my clothes. So how do I clean your rancid dog droppings from my shoes, then? And why should it be on my shoe in the first place? If I wanted to have dog crap in my life, I would get an effing dog.

If you consider yourself fit and able to be a dog owner, then you are fit and able enough to pick up after your animal. For crap's sake, people! How can you think that is acceptable? Part of being a dog owner is knowing that you have to clean up their turds, just like part of being a cat owner is knowing that you have to provide them with a litterbox. I do my part. DO your effing part! I'm tempted to sit in my window with a potato launcher and snipe cat turds from my litterbox at people on the bike path who I see offending the "pick up after your dog" rule. Yeah - it's a rule! See?

What? No mutt mitts left? Too effing bad! It's no excuse. Your dog is going to crap on this walk, so bring a backup baggie. Dog ownership 101. It is not the town's responsibility to clean up your dog's steaming loafs - it's your responsibility. Yeah - it's gross to pick up crap with nothing between your hand and the turd but a thin sheet of plastic, but you signed up for that when you decided to get a dog. So pick up the turd and shut up. It's beyond rude and gross to leave your dog crap in a public place! And it's a health hazard. Check out this shot - three steaming piles, less than five feet apart - all in the middle of the path.

So this post is just a friendly reminder to all you dog owners on the Minuteman bike path, since spring is coming and all, to clean up after your dog, or prepare to duck as airborne cat poop is potato-launched your way. Consider yourself warned.

Spring Preview

2009-03-11T16:42:00.009-04:00

This weekend it was in the 50's for the first time in ages. Snow banks began to recede, and people crept, blinking, out into the sunlight. Is winter finally over? This has been a particularly cold, long, and snowy winter, and I'm sure I speak for everyone in the vicinity when I say we are thoroughly sick of crap weather.

Sunday, as Bryan and I ventured out of the apartment, we ran into some of our neighbors who told us they were busting out the grill for dinner that evening. So after our outing, Bryan and I returned with some Italian sausages and beer and met the gang in the corner of the parking lot that we all usually occupy for the entire summer. There was still plenty of snow left, as this is also the corner that our rental company plows all of the snow into, but there we were, grilling as the sun set. It was a lovely preview to warm weather to come!

Bill and Glen welcome us to the festivities.

Bryan and Glen tend the grill.

The Queen of the Grill.

The ultimate cooler.

The next morning, it was 30 degrees and snowing again, and our grill corner was again enshrouded. But we all know that grill season is coming, soon. And so we wait for the warm again, and dream of burgers.

The Grill Corner.

Ah, the life of a cat!

2009-03-07T09:20:00.006-05:00

Been Away Too Long

2009-03-06T12:00:00.002-05:00

Greeting, Hazmat Fans!

Yes, I'm still alive, and I have been a major blog delinquent. I really have no excuse, either. I have been neglecting the land of Hazmat, and for this, I humbly apologize. In preparation for this year's BufBloPoFo, in which I intend to participate, I am back with this blog post, doing a warm-up lap. Here's a brief catch-up on what has been up in the land of Hazmat since last I posted:

- I last my job last year, and have had a very difficult time finding a new one. Me and everyone else in the country.

- I am super happy that Obama won the election, and even happier that W cannot run for it again, ever. I still think that Cheney is a cyborg.

- I read the Twilight series, twice in a row.

- My husband and I conquered Lego Indiana Jones, are mastering Boom Blox and are still addicted to Mario Kart. I love the Wii!

- I got the flu, which sucked.

- I've been going to the gym a lot more since I'm unemployed, so while my income has gone down, so has (hopefully) my cholesterol. So that's good, right?

Anyway, that was exhausting. I better rest before my next blog post. Need to get the ol' blogger brain back in shape! See you soon for BufBloPoFo!

Adventures in the Kitchen

2008-10-24T11:27:00.018-04:00

Last week I decided I felt like cooking something I had never cooked before. Our friends Bill and Alison were coming over that night for dinner, and I wanted to cook something interesting. I was feeling festive, but wanted comfort food. What could I make that would satisfy that spicy craving with the warm, full belly comfort food craving?

I decided it was time for me to learn to make Gumbo.

I turned to the internet for a recipe, thinking I could make it in the slow cooker; but every recipe I found for the slow cooker had a thousand comments on it by real true Louisiana folk saying "This isn't Gumbo! Gumbo isn't gumbo unless it starts with a roux." One of the comments had a link to Emeril's recipe for gumbo, saying it was authentic and delicious, from a true Louisianan's point of view. So I thought, hey, if this recipe is Emeril AND Louisianan approved, that's what I'm using. For those of you who would like the recipe, here is the link.

I started my gumbo first by cutting up ingredients ahead of time.

Then I started the all-important roux. It took about half an hour for the roux to reach the desired chocolate brown color before I could add in the vegetables.

The Roux involved lots of stirring. Lots. Like constant, for half an hour.

When the roux was ready, I tossed in the onions, green peppers, celery, and some garlic - which I added to the recipe. Garlic should be in everything, in my opinion. Except desserts.

Then I had to add the sausage and spices. At this point, it is starting to smell uber delicious.

Next I poured in the water, and the true gumbo-ness of the gumbo started to take shape.

After several hours of stirring, simmering, and skimming, the gumbo was finally ready. I served it over Jasmine rice, which was so aromatic it worked really well with the gumbo's subdued spiciness.

I also made hush-puppies, but I cheated on those, choosing to make them baked instead of fried. They were more like fancy corn muffins, but they were delicious, regardless. For dessert, I made a Mint Julep pie, which tasted kind of like bourbon pudding with a hint of mint, but was yummy.

All in all, a good dinner was had by all. And the leftovers were fabulous!

Observations

2008-10-15T11:36:00.004-04:00

Greetings, Hazmat Fans!

Here are some observations I've made mental notes about lately. All of these things were supposed to be their own blog posts but instead got boiled down to this. Perhaps I will revisit them when the 2009 BufBloPoFo rolls around!

1. Did you ever notice that the SciFi/Fantasy section is right next to the Romance section at Barnes and Noble? Is this the bookseller's way of bringing lonely souls together? It's kind of romantic, really. Love at the bookstore. I noticed this while perusing the SciFi/Fantasy section a while back - I turned around to what I thought would be the SciFi "M - Z by Author" section and saw row upon row of bodices and men with their shirts half unbuttoned - the Romance Section. Then I looked back at the SciFi/Fantasy section and saw knights and mages and warriors ... it all made sense.

2. Leaf Blowers are the most useless things on the planet. Are we as a society that lazy that we can't pick up a rake anymore? Blow the leaves in the street. Then the cars blow them back up onto the sidewalk. Blow the leaves into a pile in the parking lot and leave them. (ha - leave them!) Then the wind kicks up and scatters them again. Leaf blowers waste gas, churn out fumes, and cause noise pollution. Rakes are quiet and work your cardiovascular system. I'm voting for rakes!

3. Speaking of the politics of lawn care, or rather, bike path care, I would like to throw a shout out to all of you using the Minuteman Bikeway: Clean up your dog poop!! WTF! And say "On Your Left" or ding your bell if you are speeding by me while I'm walking. I can't necessarily hear you speeding up behind me and I don't want to lose an arm as you speed by in your spandex. I would say about 1 in 10 cyclists who whiz by me alert me to their presence. And I'm on the bike path a lot these days - walking to get where I need to go. It's cheaper than driving. And I've lost 7 pounds in the process!

4. Halloween is nearly upon us - my favorite holiday! Last year I was on my honeymoon in Mexico during Halloween so I didn't get to dress up. Well, if you count being a beach bum for Halloween, then ok, but anyone who knows me knows I usually go more elaborate than that with my costumes. I have several ideas this year ... I just have no idea where to wear them. What's the coolest place in Boston to go for Halloween? I'm not really into the club scene. I'm more into the pub scene. Maybe I'll have to scope that out. I've already been a pirate - handing out flyers for The Costume Company in Arlington. Er, AARGHlington!

Ok, well, I have to get back to being productive. Hopefully will blog again soon!

The power's off and my underpants are on the sidewalk

2008-09-15T16:08:00.006-04:00

This morning, I awoke, showered, made coffee, and sat down at my computer to begin the day's job search, as I was laid off in May and my long-term temp assignment has ended. I took a sip of my coffee, thinking I might have to nuke it as it wasn't as hot as it should be thanks to a generous dose of half-and -half.

At which point, the power in our building promptly shut off.

I waited the obligatory 15 minutes to see if it was a fluke before dialing NSTAR's customer service hotline to report an outage. I got the most vague, voice-activated automated system I have ever had the displeasure of talking to. A slightly metallic and overly friendly droid woman's voice said "Thank you for calling NSTAR's customer service hotline. Please tell me about your call so that I can better help you." Tell her what? How much information does she need? Isn't she going to give me any options, like if it's a billing related call or if I would like to access my account online, or do I, say, need to report an outage? This is the electric company, a major utility, not paint-your-own-pottery or magazine subscription customer service.

So I did as I normally do on the voice-activated systems to bypass their pre-recorded pseudo sincerity: I said "Customer Serivice Representative."

The automated beeyotch had the audacity to say to me, "Are you sure? Our representatives might be busy," at which I felt that she was either sentient and lonely or it was yet another ploy to keep me from actually speaking to a human. So I said it again: "Customer Serivice Representative." There may have been a note of dejection in her computer-generated voice as she said "Please hold while I transfer your call."

I was on hold for about two seconds before she returned to tell me that all representatives were busy and that I was not being given the option to hold so I could just hang up. I did however have the option to type in my 9 digit phone number to have a representative call me back. I got the feeling that she was not going to tell the representatives that I had called and that she was going to save my number and prank call me in the middle of the night. So I hung up and called back.

She answered again - I swear she knew it was me - and this time I tried saying "report outage" to her vague offer of assistance. She transfered me to another automated line - this time a male - her boyfriend? - which was of absolutely no help to me at all, except to tell me in a superior voice that an outage will likely be remedied in 2 to 3 hours, and a representative can call me back if I leave my number to update me on the number of hours the outage would be fixed in. So I fumed and decided that if the power was out here, I should go do something productive, like run errands or something.

I went to Petco. I bought cat food and checked out their fish section. I went to the bank and took out some cash, in case the power was out all day and we can't cook for dinner. I came home to find the power was still out so I grumbled. I cleaned out my car. I sorted the laundry that I was planning on doing here in my building while looking for work all day. I loaded the car with laundry and drove down the street to the laundromat, where thankfully, they had power. All this time, I hadn't eaten anything except a cookie, because they were out on the counter and I didn't want to open the fridge and let the cool air out. I couldn't heat up anything anyway.

So after hauling two very full laundry baskets from my car - one trip back to the car for each - into the laundromat, and getting 5 loads started on the wash cycle, I decided to walk two doors down and get a slice of pizza to tide me over. Keep in mind this is the fifth time I have walked to or past my car since carrying in the first basket, full of whites. I grab my slice of cheese pizza and start back toward the laundromat, trip number 6 down the sidewalk, when I see a crumpled mass of flowers on the cement before me. No ... not flowers. It's flowered clothing. No, not clothing - underwear. My underwear. My only pair of flowered underwear - the bright gaudy ugly pair you only wear when you are at the bottom of the barrel before laundry day. These ones I had worn yesterday. And there they were, proclaiming their freedom on the busy sidewalk of the busiest street in town. I grabbed them and stuffed them under my arm, and slunk into the laundromat, where I contemplated throwing them away, but then I realized that the bottom-of the drawer, horrid flowered underwear where there for a reason - like the gas light in your car. They signified that you better get your ass to the laundromat or you'll be on to bathing suit bottoms before the end of the week. So I tossed them in with one of the loads I had already started.

It took two hours in the sweaty laundromat but the laundry was done, so I came home, and was blessed to find the power was back on. Almost six hours after it went out. So much for the 2 to 3 hours estimate Mr. Automated gave me. I knew he was lying and I bet his automated girlfriend put him up to it. Whatever.

At least I can reheat my coffee now.

Mutant Makeover

2008-08-07T23:19:00.002-04:00

Greetings, Hazmat Fans!

Like the new digs? I figured, since I've been away for a while, that I would mark my triumphant return with a makeover. My friend Ryan designed the Hazmat Spokesgirl, Toxic Tessie, above. He's the awesomist artist ever. AND he's a zombie.

So where the heck have I been, aside from a lame He-Man post and some pictures from Disneyland? Well, there are a couple of explanations. First, it's summer, and we northeasterners like to get out and cram our free time with travel and visits and other things that aren't easily done in snow and cold. Also, my sister had a baby - Owen James - who is super duper cute, and I've been spending time being an aunt. I've also been writing. A lot. Which is awesome. I have several writing projects that have all been at various levels of completion over the years, and I just finally said 'That's it!' and buckled down to finish one before I move on to the next. The rough draft should be done by the end of August. Woo and Hoo!!

So, all this cool stuff, eh, and why have I not been blogging about it? Well, believe it or not, sometimes I just get sick of the Internet - well, sick of everything but the LOL Cats anyway. Everything - Blogger, Facebook, E-mail in general. Remember - all you Gen-Xers out there - when there was no such thing as the Internet? How did we all spend our free time then? Me, I did a lot of drawing, writing, painting, and playing volleyball or badminton outside with the fam. From about April until, oh, say, now, I've been kind of uninterested in the interwebs. Occasionally I would update my Facebook status or post said Disneyland photos to Hazmat, but I've been away from it all - including e-mail, which was bad and kinda lame.

Back in May I turned 32, and maybe it was that combined with Owen's arrival as the next generation, but lately I've been embracing my inner Gen-Xer. I've been thinking a lot about how Owen, and eventually my own kids (someday, no time soon, maybe in a few years ... does that cover it all?) will be growing up in a world filled with all of these interwebian distractions. I remember when pushing a button on Barbie or Optimus Prime and hearing the 3 staple voice recordings repeat back to you over and over was the height of technological coolness. Now I can play Mario Kart with people from Japan and Spain from the comfort of my own couch.

(Oh, and that would be another reason I've been off the interwebs lately ... my name is Marcy and I'm a Mario Kart Wii Addict ... Hi Marcy ...)

Don't get me wrong - I'm not giving up the Internet - oh, no. That would be like giving up phones, or carbs, or seeing a picture of Earth taken from space and then saying "...mmmmmNAH. The Earth is flat." I'm just doing more away from the interwebs, and when I'm on the interwebs, I'm making an attempt to have it be purposeful, not just for boredom.

(OK, with the exception of last night when I discovered the 'Pieces of Flair' application on Facebook, which started out as boredom but became purposeful.)

So, long story even longer, I'm back, and Hazmat has a new look, and I might have to go play some Mario Kart now.

Back atcha soon.

By The Power of Grayskull!

2008-07-23T21:49:00.004-04:00

On a whim, Bryan and I rented the "Masters of the Universe" movie from 1980-something. I remember thinking this movie sucked when I was a kid - and I was an avid He-Man fan. So what compelled me to want to rent it as an adult? I have no idea, but by the end of the movie (yes, we actually sat through the entire film) I was smashing the remote control into my head. AWFUL! But did I expect anything more? When we turned off the DVD player, NOVA was on. I love NOVA! We should have watched NOVA instead.

Put me in coach - I'm ready for pain!

2008-06-30T18:48:00.003-04:00

A junior high gym class memory drifted back to me today after passing by some little league fields.

It was a late spring day, and we were forced to play softball. My gym teacher insisted that you wear the baseball glove on the opposite hand you use for throwing, but I could't catch with my left hand. (I could barely catch with two - coordination is not my forte.) I was handed my left-hand glove and sent to the far reaches of the outfield - this was the gym-class equivalent of my position on the junior high basketball team – center bench.

I was absolutely terrible at anything that wasn't archery or distance running – especially if it involved coordination and the potential for pain. Softball and baseball fell under the same categories as floor hockey, dodgeball and tetherball for me – the "if it's coming my way and might hit me, I would just as soon duck" category. So there I was, in the outfield with a glove on my left hand, and I was facing the sun so I couldn't see anything at all.

I vaguely remember the scene; there was the crack of a bat and a bunch of yelling. And out of the glare of the sun the ball came straight at me. By the time I realized it was beelining for my brain I had only enough time to instinctively reach up and catch it - with my right hand, because I am right handed. I know I would have caught that ball if I was wearing the glove on my right hand, and the kid who line-drove it at my head would have been out. Instead, the ball literally flew through my hand, bending my fingers so far back that I swear the nail of my middle finger actually touched my forearm. (In my slow-motion memory replay, that's what happened, anyway.)

I remember hearing my gym teacher yelling "Use the glove!!" but it was too late. My instinct to protect my head was stronger than my instinct to help my team. The ball rolled way behind me and I think the kid must have gotten several bases off of my inability to catch – and throw, as now my throwing hand was useless. That wrist still aches and makes cracking noises to this day. Ah, memories.

Yeah, so if you ever need someone to fill in your softball, baseball, volleyball, tetherball, dodgeball, floor hockey or regular hockey teams, don't call me. If, however, the game is capture the flag, TV tag, or any of the above sports using a beach ball instead of the regulation ball, I'm game.

A Message for Mr. McMahon

2008-06-14T11:34:00.003-04:00

Dear Vince,

Please can you make Edge go back to being funny Edge? Like back when he and Kurt Angle were feuding? He used to be my favorite wrestler and now I just squirm with revulsion when he's on the screen. The reason I got into wrestling in the first place was the comedy combined with the ass kicking. Now it just seems to be more about the ass kicking. And what happened to women actually, you know, wrestling? You had a good thing going on there for a while - now it seems you've reverted.

This whole Bad-ass Edge is fine I guess - I like bad-asses, but he was much more entertaining when he was funny. Can't he be a funny bad-ass? And really, this Vickie Guerrero thing has gone on far too long. It's beyond uncomfortable to watch at this point (actually, from the get-go.) I love WWE for being over the top and crazy, and funny, and entertaining. But seriously, you are turing off at least two loyal fans - my husband and I. Ticket-buying, ratings-giving fans.

Anyway, Vince, I just thought I would share some thoughts after turning on Smackdown for 2 mintues tonight just to turn it back off after seeing Edge & Vickie again. *shudder.* Maybe tell your son-in-law to go on a writers' retreat and maybe an improv comedy boot camp or something. I know a great one in L.A.

Just a thought.

Word/Life,

Marcy Mahoney

Headin' for the Hills - the Hollywood Hills

2008-06-07T00:03:00.004-04:00

Greetings, Hazmat Fans!

Yes, I've been away from the blog for over an eventful month. First I lost my job (I'm a statistic!) then I started a temporary one, and then I went on a trip to Los Angeles. But I'm back now and full of blogolicious fodder thanks to said trip. For the overview, click HERE and view Bryan's summary of the trip. And for more detail and fun photos, keep reading over the next week or so, or whenever I get back around to posting again.

Bryan and I on Hollywood Blvd., and you can just make out the Hollywood sign on the hill to the left of Bryan's head.

L.A. Trip: Hollywood

We started Hollywood Day with brunch at a cool little hipster restaurant in Eagle Rock called Auntie Em's that my friend Beth recommended. There I experienced some of the best French toast I've ever had. Seriously, this place was kind of a trendy dive but the food was excellent and so was the service. Then we went and showed Bryan the secret route up to the Hollywood sign that only residents know about. A run of the mill tourist would have to be pretty crafty to deduce this route, as I lived there 5 years and I don't even know the street names to get there, just when to turn left and right. Then we took Bryan down to Hollywood and showed him the walk of fame and the handprints outside of the Chinese Theater. There we saw a wannabe Marylin Monroe in a messy dress smoking a cigarette and engrossed in a conversation with an even more filthy looking Spiderman. Ah, Hollywood.

The Universal Studios Backlot is in the bottom foreground with Burbank sprawling out behind it.

After our tour of Hollywood, we moved on to Universal Citywalk, the shopping and eating strip outside of Universal Studios. (Which was not on fire at that time.) We thought about going to Universal Studios, but admission price is $64 and frankly not worth it unless you live in the area and want the included yearly pass. (Though I imagine after yesterday's fire, those prices will be going up!) We had Tapas at Café TuTu Tango, which had ironically sent me an e-coupon for a free appetizer last week in honor of my birthday, just in time for our trip. The waiter gave me a free birthday flan with a candle in it, too. Nice! After Dinner we saw Indiana Jones which was much better than I expected it to be. (Let's face it, George Lucas has not exactly given anyone reason to expect greatness of him since the original Star Wars Trilogy's re-release in 97, when supposedly Greedo shot first. Greedo? I think not, Mr. Lucas. But let's not go off on that old rant …) It occurred to me that I am 32 years old and this is the first Indiana Jones movie I've seen in the theater. (We just rented movies when I was a kid – I think I only saw about 7 movies in a theater until I was a teenager.) It was pretty cool to hear that theme song in a theater, and I was not horrified by the film as I thought I would be. Thanks, George and Steven, though I still don't trust you, George. It will take a lot more than an entertaining Indiana Jones film to make up for the invention of Midichlorians.

I'll be back with More L.A. Trip stories soon. Stay Tuned!

Musings after a Trip to the Pump

2008-06-06T23:53:00.002-04:00

I bought my car 10 years ago this August. It’s a lavender, 1997 Geo Prizim, which is essentially an 11-year-old Toyota Corolla with GM body. I could drive my car to San Diego and Back eight times before needing to fill the gas tank. I can also drive from Rochester to Boston on one tank of gas. It’s a great car, even though the air/heat doesn’t work anymore, the driver’s side door won’t unlock from the outside (no power locks on this beaut) and the driver’s side roof leaks onto the seat when it precipitates. (Thank you, trusty garbage bag that keeps my seat dry when it rains.) The tape deck (yes folks, no CDs here) eats tapes now, which I learned the hard way when it ate a mix tape I made in college a few months ago) so I have to listen to the radio whenever I drive, or my iPod-Radio Adapter if I can’t stand Boston radio stations anymore. (I’m down to Mike FM – it’s random enough to almost be my iPod. Almost. I wouldn’t play so much Huey Lewis though.) But despite all the things that are not so glamorous about my car, it gets wonderful gas mileage. To see how fuel efficient a Geo is – particularly mine, which was made to California Emmisions standards which are some of, if not the, highest standards in the nation – check out this link.

Back when I bought my car, it cost me just over $10 to fill up the tank. It is just now rounding on 10 years later, and it costs me $41.40 to fill the tank. That’s 4 times as much as it did 10 years ago. 4 times!!! Not enough time has passed for it to have gone up that much. I understand the whole inflation thing, that coffee used to cost my grandparents 10 cents a cup 50 years ago and now (unless you go to Starbucks) it’s 2 or 3 dollars. But 10 years is not inflation, it’s greed and insanity and political jack-assedness. I know all about weak dollar and the supply and demand worries and all of that stuff that is contributing, but it all boils down to greed. Greed keeps us from having alternative means of fueling things, though that is finally, slowly, starting to make its way to the forefront. (I won’t be able to afford a hybrid anytime soon, though, with the economy’s joyous outlook and that whole being laid off thing.) Big Oil is more important to the big cheeses than, say, sending money toward education and student financial aid, Universal Health Care, or countless other issues that plague our country from the inside.

During the 10 years it has been since I paid $0.95 a gallon (and though that was high) I’ve been laid off twice, and have ever so slowly been scooping myself out of the debt that being laid off while still paying for my college education put on me. And of those 10 years, 8 of them were under the current administration. I do not find this at all coincidence. I don’t usually get political on this blog but when I filled up the tank on my little Geo this morning and saw the total I almost crapped my own head.

I just want to say one thing about Barak, or to him, if he ever happens across this humble little blog. All I want from him is to prove me wrong in my thinking about politicians in general. If you can do that, AFTER you have my vote, then there is hope, because let me tell you sir, my thinking about politicians in general is limited to pretty much everyone sucks except for my Grandpa.

I suppose we shall see.

An Ode to Allergies

2008-04-25T11:18:00.006-04:00

Oh Flowering Tree

Your sweet scent drifts on breezes

Through my bedroom window

And I wheeze

My eyes burning from your touch

Your delicate blossoms, soft as silk

Attack my sinuses with barbarian fury

Holding my breathing prisoner

In your hystamine war.

Dainty, white flowers, dancing in wind,

Sighing in sunshine

As pressure builds in my sinuses

Teeth throbbing,

Eyes watering,

Your beauty is my pain

Your scent, my torment

Your pollen, my enemy.

Laugh, blossoms,

Laugh in the sun, in the breeze,

In the spring air,

But you will fall with summer

And I shall be victorious,

Until the humidity arrives,

And the battle of comfort begins anew.

Ah, Warm Weather and the MBTA

2008-04-24T19:33:00.003-04:00

It's springtime in Boston, and the weather has been practically summer-like.

Yes, folks, you know what this means - the armpits are back on the T. I was in a stink sammich on the T tonight and it was made of fresh, ripe pits. Mmmmmm, BO& T.

Thankfully, the pollen is also out so my sinuses were too swollen to let in all the stink. But T riders, remember, the magic word is DEODORANT.

Oh, and that rat is STILL THERE at South Station, badly decomposed, but has the same expression on its face. And it, too, stinks.

Ah, springtime.

Call Me Ponce de Leon

2008-04-18T18:14:00.003-04:00

I have found the fountain of youth. It is a 52 year old Italian man I met on the bus tonight.

At first, when this gentleman started talking to me I thought, oh great, one of those bus talkers. You know the ones who sit down by you and tell you about their day and their dogs and all of their troubles while you wish you had popped in your iPod sooner. But as it turns out, this guy was not one of those bus talkers. He was, as I said, a gentleman.

He began talking to me as if he knew me already, though I usually don't take this particular bus route and in fact had never met this man in my life. He told me first off that I look like Meg Ryan, and he met her in Harvard Square years back at the Hasty Pudding festivities, and so, he knows what she looks like in person. He then noticed my wedding ring and commented that my husband was lucky to have a wife who looked like Meg Ryan. He then told me of his catering business which sprung from years before as an owner of three restaurants. He worked with his two uncles, one who is eighty five and the other who was eighty seven when he died but worked every day in his life and never got sick until after a routine checkup at which he contracted a staph infection at the hospital that did him in. Then he told me about his 108 year old grandmother who loves junk food and has a bone to pick with Willard Scott. Several bones to pick with him, in fact. He told me he has been to several Super Bowls and championship games of professional sports and has also been to the Rose Bowl a few times. He told me of his family who lived in California and where, and why some of them came back east. He told me all of this in great detail - so much detail I can't remember all of it to sufficiently tell this story - in a manner of a few short bus stops. And just before I got off the bus, he told me his family's secrets to longevity and youth:

1: Drink LOTS of ice water. With lemon.

2: Eat junk food.

and 3 - most importantly - more important than anything:

Laugh.

Laughing is medicinal, therapeutic, and is the cure for what ails ya. And I completely agree with him. But it was one of those things that I needed someone to tell me again, when I was feeling stressed out and a little down. I was in a funk when I got on the bus, and I thought, upon first sitting next to this gentleman who started talking to me even before my butt cheeks were planted on the hard-molded plastic, that this was going to be another one of those bus rides to endure. But I found myself warming up to this gentleman for the very reason he preached to me before I left the bus - he made me laugh. He was the epitome of his own philosophy.

When I got to my stop, I told him that it had been nice talking to him, and he waved at me and said "Ciao, Bella." My mood was lightened. I only hope his day was as enriched by my presence as mine was from his.

So thank you, Mr. Italian Guy On The Bus, for making me laugh today, and many more laughs to you and yours.

Trip-pin'

2008-04-18T10:32:00.004-04:00

Sorry for the lapse in bloggage. Busy times these days.

I am looking forward to this weekend - we have some friends visiting from Canandaigua and we are going to be seeing the sights here in Boston. The weather is great and the trees are budding so it should be a great weekend for walking history tours and the aquarium and fun! And a cookout! I have been stressed out lately with work and Bryan has been uber busy with work too so it will be nice to have a weekend of fun. And our friends have three little girls, so it's always fun to see the sights you know through their eyes. Brings an element of magic to the everyday. I'll post some pictures after this weekend of our adventures.

In other exciting sightseeing news, Bryan and I are taking a trip out to Los Angeles later this spring, for which I cannot wait! I haven't been back to LA since I moved away from there in 2002, and I am long overdue for visits with friends and some Southern California sunshine. And Chili John's in Burbank. And Disneyland. And AWESOME Mexican food! Is it weird that I miss driving on the freeways? With all the windows down and the sun out and the music up? Boston side streets are not exactly made for that sort of thing. They're not even really made for cars, more like horses and wagons. And don't expect to find a street sign anywhere - it's a game to find your way around. LA has traffic, sure, but not always and not everywhere, like there seems to be here. At least the streets there are clearly marked! I'm not knocking Boston, it's a great city and a lot of fun to live in, but I am really looking forward to a little West Coast respite. Bryan's never been to the West Coast either, so it will be fun for me to play tour guide. And did I mention AWESOME Mexican food?!

After our CA trip, we are hunkering down in Boston for the majority of the summer, hanging out with my sister and brother-in-law who are about to become parents. Talk about a new adventure! We get to be the crazy-fun aunt and uncle who live nearby and have lots of Legos. That suits me just fine - I've always wanted to be an aunt - I've had lots of good aunt examples in my own life. (I have 9 aunts and one great-aunt!) I look forward to doting on my sister's offspring - it's all cool with me as long as I don't have to clean up poop. I'm not really ready for or into that whole thing yet. (This is why I have a cat. At least he poops in a box with a plastic bag in it that I can just tie up and throw out. And he cleans himself up. Most of the time.)

Anyway, fun things await Los Mahoneys over the next few months. The excitement! The fun visits! The AWESOME Mexican Food! The new arrival who will eventually come over and play Legos with us!

RatWatch, Day 11

2008-04-18T10:30:00.002-04:00

The dead rat is still there (see previous post) and now it stinks. Seriously, can't someone remove that thing?!?

A Public Service Announcement

2008-04-08T19:47:00.004-04:00

There is a dead rat stuck to the tracks at South Station, on the Alewife-bound side.

I first saw it four days ago, and thought someone had dropped a very dirty grey mitten into the tracks.

Two days ago I realized the mitten had toes and teeth and I almost hurled.

It was still there today in the same exact pose, stuck to the same part of the rail.

Someone out there in MBTA-land, please, remove the rat before I lose my lunch.

Thank you.

It's a beautiful day!!

2008-04-04T10:26:00.004-04:00

Sure, it's pouring oustide and miserably cold. But it doesn't matter, because of THIS:

YEE HAW!!!!!! WOO HOO!!!! I'm almost 32 years old and I will FINALLY get to see NKOTB in concert!! Seriously, this kicks so much ass. My day is made!
Happy Friday!!!

Comedy and Tragedy

2008-04-03T10:39:00.003-04:00

Here’s something funny: I tripped on a curb today and nearly went sailing into the pavement. But I didn’t fall. But it still must’ve looked pretty darn funny. I can picture it in slow motion; me with my spindly, lanky gazelle-like arms and legs flailing in the morning sunlight, on the brink of falling, teetering forward and back as my coffee sloshes dangerously close to the opening in the lid. It must’ve been an amusing site to anyone walking in my vicinity. But I regained my balance and made it into the building unscathed. Or so I thought.

Here comes the tragedy: On that unforgiving cement curb, I scuffed the toe of my favorite red patent leather, kitten heel Mary Janes. Do you know what a scuff looks like in red patent leather?! It looks like crap! And it’s not just a little scrape. It scuffed all the way down to the brown material beneath. It looks like I have a piece of paper bag stuck to the tip of my beloved shiny, pointy shoes. Today I was rejoicing that the weather is nice enough to wear shoes instead of boots again – let alone my favorite shoes! And now they are besmirched. Blemished. Spoiled. I must go to Zappos.com and see if they can be replaced. Or perhaps a cobbler, who may have some gift of patent leather CPR, though I don’t hold out hope that their pristine shiny surface can ever be whole again. I know I only paid $14.00 for them at Payless, but I still love them! Blast it!
This is precisely why I buy cheap shoes, because I’m not going to pay hundreds of dollars for something the curb could destroy.

Gastronomical Rudeness

2008-03-25T21:50:00.011-04:00

OK, I'm about to blog about a not-so-pretty topic, and I apologize in advance for sounding crass to anyone who thinks a lady does not speak of such things, but I'm sure that if they were in my shoes in this situation they would get fed up too and need to vent somewhere. I am choosing to vent here.

I speak, of course, about people who fart on public transportation.

The bus, the train - when these people are standing and I happen to be sitting - nose at butt level!! - and I suddenly get a putrid whiff of their last meal, this really gets my goat. I'm sorry, I have been commuting this way since May, and tonight I finally reached my inhaling strangers' emissions' limit.

I sat by a guy on the train tonight who smelled like he crapped his pants. He was well dressed, seemingly well groomed, but whatever he had dropped before I sat down next to him was lingering in the fibers of his pants. It was however, the only empty seat at the time so I sat and tried my luck at waiting to see who got off at the next stop. I was lucky - three girls next to me got off, and I quickly moved two seats away from Senor SmellyPants. More people get on, a girl between he and I , three more people to my left, and another guy standing in front of me. The train starts rolling, but I am far enough away that SmellyPant's lingering odor is not in my personal space.

That is, until he cuts a fresh one.

It wasn't even like when you sniff and crinkle your nose and hold your breath for a second. This was more like an invisible sledgehammer of sewage straight to the olfactory senses. It was so bad the three people to my left - all farther away from this guy - were all holding their noses. And the guy standing in front of me actually held his arm up to his nose and said "Jesus Christ!" I myself was gasping for fresh air and was seriously mad that I had finished reading my book at lunch today so I didn't even have fiction to distract me from the nasal horror I was living.

Once the cloud had passed a bit - four stops later! - and I could get fresh oxygen circulating in my brain again, I got mad. I couldn't say anything to the guy - SmellyPants had vacated the train but I missed it because I think my eyes were clouded over with a film of stench. I am just sick and tired of smelling other people's ass on the train, or the bus. I do not pass gas on the train, and I expect the same courtesy from others! It is an enclosed space with no air circulation and extremely close personal contact - have a little freaking common courtesy! (The same thing goes for wearing deodorant, people. I know I have touched on this in older posts, but BO falls in the same category as train farts with me.) And if I am sitting, and you are standing, and I can actually hear the fart, please be aware that I am going to kick you in the shins. Be glad it's just a shin bruise and not me returning the stink favor.

On a brighter note, Bryan and I found Easter cake at the grocery store for half price tonight. Half-price cake does not make up for smelling other people's nastiness on the way home. But cake is awesome and half-price cake is cheap awesome, so we have to take what joys we can find in our day and raise them up, right?

Half Priced Cake!

iLuv

2008-03-25T09:29:00.005-04:00

I love my iPod. Where else can I listen to New Kids On The Block whilst actually mingling among people? I was Hangin' Tough at the gym last night and looking around at everyone thinking "you people have no idea that I am listening to NKOTB right now, do you?" I was wondering what others were listening to also - if they were indulging their guilty pleasures within the safety of their ear buds as well. Right Said Fred? Paris Hilton? Air Supply?

I know my husband, who was hauling ass on the treadmill next to me, was very likely listening to Zeppelin considering that his iPod Shuffle is almost entirely comprised of Zeppelin music. And it occured to me that one of the BufBloPoFo topics that I skipped over had to do with what music one is listening to and what are some examples of one's playlists. Well, I can assure you, I am the queen of random.

If I put my iPod Nano on 'shuffle songs,' here's what I get:

Annie Lennox - Pavement Cracks
System of a Down - Chop Suey
Our Lady Peace - Whatever
David Arkenstone - Wind in the Trees (New Age)
P.M. Dawn - Die Without You
Justin Timberlake - LoveStoned
The Carpenters - The Christmas Waltz
Brak - Beeflog (from Brak presents the Brak album, starring Brack)
Foo Fighters - Best of You
B52's - Strobelight
Adagio Music for Meditation - Meadow (yoga/meditation music)
Def Leppard - Photograph
Strawberry Alarm Clock - Incense and Peppermints
Gorrilaz - Feel Good Inc
Van Halen - Right Now
Enya - Shepherd Moons
Duran Duran - View to a Kill
Sting - Fortress Around Your Heart
David Arkenstone - We Three Kings (from Enchantment, his holiday album)
New Kids On The Block - If You Go Away
Extreme - Hole Hearted
Toad & the Wet Sprocket - All I Want
Weird Al Yankovic - The Saga Begins
Rob Zombie - Never Gonna Stop
Finger 11 - Paralyzed
Jewel - Am I Standing Still
Eurythmics - Missionary Man
Poison - Talk Dirty to Me
Brack - Really Cool Song (from Brak presents the Brak album, starring Brack)
Josh Groban - Alejate
Limp Bizkit - My Way

See? Random!!

Obi Cat Kenobi?!

2008-03-20T22:09:00.004-04:00

Ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod!

This was on Stuff On My Cat tonight - this might be my favorite video ever!!!! Cat acting out Star Wars characters in order of appearance in the movie - complete with sound effects!!

Hooray for BufBloPoFo!

2008-03-18T09:39:00.004-04:00

Whew! Blogging every day was quite a challenge, especially with the flu rearing it's ugly head. But I'm proud to be a BufBloPoFo Completer! I hope most of my posts were entertaining, at least. I'm going to try to not fall back into the ridiculously sporadic posting zone, though I can pretty much guarantee that posting every single day is not going to happen. But the BufBloPoFo has taught me a certain level of discipline with my blogging, and clued me in that people actually do read my blog once in a while. So now that I know I have even a small audience, I will attempt to thrill and entertain you all on a more regular basis. Or at least ramble about something occasionally. I also plan on being a regular reader of the BufBloPoFo blogs that I discovered in the process. All in all, I think the challenge was a great success and a cool way to bring bloggers together on the interwebs. And I'm looking forward to BufBloPoFo '09!

It was a mellow St. Pat's day for me here in Boston yesterday. Just a typical Monday really, with work and going to the gym. I did have a nice Boston St. Pat's moment yesterday, though; on my way back from a meeting I was walking through Boston Common in the late afternoon sunlight, and I heard a piper out in the park playing "Wearin' o'the Green." It was a very organic meeting of elements - sunlight, music, crisp air, muddy early spring earth. Lovely.

Later Dudes.

O-blogitory post

2008-03-14T10:32:00.004-04:00

Good Day, Ladies and Gents!

I am posting in a hurry this morning so as not to miss out on my BufBloPoFo duties but we are going on a road trip so this has to be short because Bryan needs to blog before we go, too.

Here's a pic of what my cat is doing right this very moment - ain't technology grand?

Here's what my husband is doing (playing with the ringtones on his cell phone.)

And that's just me. Being me. Heh.

Rock on, Blogland.

I burned frozen pizza

2008-03-13T21:10:00.004-04:00

I burned a frozen pizza in the oven tonight. Something about that smacks of irony.

Today was a long day and this evening was too busy and it's almost 10:00 and I'm just sitting down. I don't really have much energy to blog, but I'm here! Lets see; what can I blog about?

How about another video from bored Mahoneys with a goofy Web cam program?

Questions and Little Known Facts

2008-03-12T10:09:00.003-04:00

I'm going to cover yesterday and today's BufBloPoFo topics all in one post, so here goes.

*ahem.*

1. What is your favorite word? Nomad

What is your least favorite word? Tit

2. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Creatively: Rainy, foggy days
Spiritually: Sunshine through trees, really bright moonlight
Emotionally: Security

What turns you off? Closed-mindedness

3. What sound or noise do you love? Wind chimes, My cat purring

What sound or noise do you hate? Dot matrix printers, ripping paper, dogs barking

4. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Professional Costumer, Art Teacher

What profession would you not like to do? Politics

5. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

She'd say "Yes, it was about the journey, not the destination."

Here are some things you may not know about me:

I once woke up in the middle of the night as a kid to find a mouse sitting on my face - scared the crap out of me. I love living in the city but I love living in the country. I also love living on the west coast but I love living on the east coast. (I am a true Gemini.) I have shrunk an inch in the last year because my scoliosis is getting worse. I love being in my '30s. I don't like strawberries unless they are in strawberry shortcake. I am very social and yet I struggle to stay calm in crowded or noisy settings. I love coming home from my commute and seeing my husband napping on the couch with our cat napping on top of him. I want to be the funniest person wherever I am. I'm usually not. I'm afraid of not living up to my creative potential, but I'm not afraid to try. I love life, even when it sucks, because everything is a lesson. I hate raw tomatoes but I like them cooked, and my husband feels exactly the same way about tomatoes, which was very refreshing when we first started dating and he didn't think me weird for pulling tomatoes off my burgers. I won't swim in anything without chlorine and a concrete bottom, but I love to swim. When I was a kid I was deathly afraid of Pirhanas and jellyfish, even though I had never seen them anywhere but in a National Geographic magazine.

Recommendations

2008-03-11T22:26:00.007-04:00

Four books I have read that I would recommend:

1. The Burning Times by Jeanne Kalogridis - a story about tolerance and love set during the black plague, the Inquisition, and involving the Knights Templar.

2. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho - A fable that tells the journey of a young man, but really, the journey is yours.

3. Biting The Sun by Tanith Lee - a dear friend recommended this book to me - it's her favorite book and it is now one of mine too. A fantastic futuristic funky story about having everything you could ever want but finding true happiness in your own mind and heart. And the writing style is incredible.

4. If Chins Could Kill - Confessions of a B Movie Actor by Bruce Campbell - Bruce is so funny, and his view of his journey into Hollywood is refreshing. He's a guy who loves what he does and it's very evident when you read his story. It's also a really fantastic point of view on filmmaking for anyone who wants to get into the industry and do things their own way.

Other things I would recommend:

- Deep Tissue Massage

- Eating lots of cake

- All-Inclusive Vacations

- Young's Double Chocolate Stout

- Wearing your seatbelt

- Donating to animal shelters (food, old towels, funds - anything!)

- Honey Mead (not just for Ren Faires anymore!)

- Yoga, or at the very least, stretching every day

- Buy fun shoes. At least two pairs.

- Meditate for at least 15 minutes every day

- Pedicures

- Save Money

And last but not least:

Bill Cosby, Ninjas, and Gorgonzola Cheese

2008-03-10T22:43:00.004-04:00

I can't think of anything to blog about tonight. Monday = long day. So Bryan and I are going to just sit here and ask each other 20 questions and I will post them with their answers.

Ok, ready, go.

MARCY: "Bryan, what are you thinking about right now?"

BRYAN: "Ketchup."

BRYAN: "If they put your name on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, what would you want your star to say?"

MARCY: "Human Muppet."

MARCY: "3DO or Sega Genesis?

BRYAN: "Super Nintendo."

MARCY: "Correct."

BRYAN: "Will you pass me a chocolate?"

MARCY: "They're behind you."

BRYAN: "Oh."

MARCY: "Ask me another one."

BRYAN: "OK. Did Han shoot first?"

MARCY: "F@&K Yeah! Stupid George Lucas."

MARCY: "What does the name 'Todd' make you think of."

BRYAN: ""Todd? Uh, a WASP with a sweater folded over his shoulders and a yellow tie and a blue shirt."

MARCY: "Oh. I was thinking The Simpsons."

BRYAN: "Oh."

BRYAN: "What's a henweigh?"

MARCY: "Uh, about 3 pounds. Duh."

MARCY: "What's the square root of awesome?"

BRYAN: "Chuck Norris."

BRYAN: "How many sweaters did Bill Cosby own?"

MARCY: "A quarter of a million. But he gave a few to Todd. To go folded over his shoulders."

10.

MARCY: "Which would you rather be forced to eat, raisins, or mayonnaise gone bad?"

BRYAN: "Raisins, but I still think they look like rabbit poop."

11.

BRYAN: "Who would win in a battle royal - Care Bears vs. Gummi Bears?"

MARCY: "The Gummi Bears would suck down their super juice and trounce the freaking Care Bears, Duke Igthorn or no Duke Igthorn."

12:

MARCY: "If you could play any musical instrument, what would it be and what song would you master?"

BRYAN: "It would be an acoustic guitar, and the only song I would ever need to know would be Pinball Wizard."

MARCY: "No Zeppelin? Denied!"

13.

BRYAN: "What's a ninja's greatest weakness?"

MARCY: "Silent but deadly farts."

14:

MARCY: "Would you rather have extra fingers, or a tail?"

BRYAN: "Would it be a prehensile tail?"

MARCY: "It would just be a tail."

BRYAN: "So I couldn't swing from trees?"

MARCY: "You could still swing from trees, you'd just have to use your arms."

BRYAN: "That's no fun, I can do that now."

MARCY: "So which would you rathe have?'

BRYAN: "Um, I would rather have ... so how many extra fingers?"

MARCY: "I didn't specify."

BRYAN: "Well, you gotta."

MARCY: "No, you can specify."

BRYAN: "Hmm. I would go with ten extra fingers, as long as they are connected to two extra arms. So I would have four arms. And people would call me Insectus."

MARCY: "You're a weird dude. Get your finger out of your nose."

BRYAN: "It's not! It's on my moustache!"

15.

MARCY: "Ok, ask me a question now."

BRYAN: "Did I already ask you about the ninjas?"

MARCY: "Yes."

BRYAN: "Oh, okay. Um ... Should we colonize the moon?"

MARCY: "No, I think we should colonize Titan or Europa instead. We'll need them when the Sun goes red dwarf."

16.

BRYAN: "What's your super power? Not what would it be, but what is it right now."

MARCY: "I make kick ass gorgonzola topped steak."

17.

MARCY: "What's the best meal you've ever eaten?"

BRYAN: "Um, I think that was a couple years back when we went to Tastings in Rochester, and I had truffle-infused mac and cheese and a cut of filet mingon that must have been from God's personal cow."

18.

BRYAN: "If you were an action heroine, what would be the name of your movie series?"

MARCY: "Kara Bruise: Klutz of Destruction."

19.

MARCY: "If you had to choose between making out with Bea Arthur AND Flava Flave, or having your jaw wired shut for twenty years, which would you choose?"

BRYAN: "Aw man! At the same time?"

MARCY: "Yeah."

BRYAN: "Eeeeew! How long do I have to kiss them?"

MARCY: "You have to make out with them!"

BRYAN: "Ok, I'd make out with them. But only because with my jaw wired shut I can't eat chicken wings."

20:

BRYAN: "Would you rather tightrope walk across the grand canyon, or have to ride the bike machine at the gym with Richard Simmons?"

MARCY: "Do I get to use my iPod?"

BRYAN: "No."

MARCY: "Can I eat lots of garlic first?"

BRYAN: "Yes."

MARCY: "Biking with Richard Simmons. Hey, that was question #20."

BRYAN: "YAY. This has been the longest 20 questions ever. But I feel closer to my wife now."

MARCY: "And Bea Arthur."

BRYAN: "And Todd."

Meep Day Delay

2008-03-09T22:34:00.006-04:00

I spent a good part of the day cleaning the apartment and tending to my poor husband who now has the flu that I had last weekend. We both now have blogged through said flu which should aptly show our unwavering commitment to the BufBloPoFo.

I spent the evening painting while Bryan watched TV. I'm trying to make an effort to paint more, and this painting is pretty freaking cool. It's a gift for Bryan for Meep Day, our made-up holiday that takes the place of Valentines day. (Here is last year's Meep Day extravaganza.) Each Meep Day, Bryan and I have to make each other presents instead of buying them. Meep Day this year was supposed to be on Leap Day, but we postponed it because I got sick, and it was supposed to be today, but we postponed it again because Bryan got sick. We are going to reschedule it once we each have our gifts done, as the whole being sick thing sort of sapped our energy for cool gift-making. So, once we have our Meep Day gift exchange, I will post a picture of the totally awesome painting I'm making for Bryan.

In the meantime, here's a cute picture of our cat Joxer, also known as Mr. Boo.

Come on, Hollywood.

2008-03-08T18:58:00.005-05:00

I saw The Other Boleyn Girl today. I read the book last week. I loved the book. But the movie was kind of a watered-down husk that didn't really capture any of the spirit of the book. There was much unexplained and - despite being portrayed by talented actors - none of the characters captured the personalities that Phillipa Gregory gave them in her novel. It was a pretty-to-watch disappointment. And I convinced Bryan to go with me on the premise that Scarlett Johansen gets naked in the movie. He too was disappointed.

To make up for this movie letdown, we are about to pop in the DVD of The King of Kong - A Fistful of Quarters. I would blog about this, but I can guarantee that Bryan will have a full account of the film on his blog tomorrow. Stay tuned ...

This isn't my only post for today, just an observation.

2008-03-08T09:26:00.004-05:00

Watching cartoons this morning I saw a commercial for a new Force Unleashed Lightsaber. With the push of a button, it changes from green-blue to red to signify which side of the force you are on. It also boasted "Spring Loaded Sith Spikes." What a random but cool sounding feature! I want my next car to have spring loaded Sith spikes!

Pants.

2008-03-07T19:42:00.006-05:00

I need new clothes. Particularly new pants. (Trousers for you Brits who might be reading this.)

I have a two trustworthy pairs of pants that are both comfortable and look good, but the rest are either too big, too small, too short, or have permanent mud stains on the cuffs from my commute. My pink Old Navy pants were scuffed on the cuffs, but I wore them anyway because in my winter wardrobe I have been desperate for pants. (No skirts in the winter for me.)

My trusty pink pants bit the dust yesterday when I fell off a curb and into the street, onto my knees. Not only did the knees of my pants get permanent asphalt stains on them, but I skinned my knee and wrenched my shoulder catching myself as I fell. I looked like a 5 year old with my skinned knee and Peanuts Gang Band-Aid later.

Anyway, I plan on going sometime this spring and seeing what Old Navy has to offer in the way of new pants. (Trousers.) But I'm going to wait until the weather clears up a bit first.

This may be my most exciting blog post EVER.

And now, a song about pants. (I think they mean Trousers.)

Alla Luce Del Sole

2008-03-06T20:37:00.003-05:00

I have to cross a bridge over the inlet near Boston Harbor to get to my building, and this morning was a beautiful morning. The sun was shining on the water and it was not freezing outside. And Josh Groban was singing in Italian on my iPod in my ears. And I was thinking, Josh Groban should sing in Italian every time I walk somewhere.

Just thought I'd share.

Must watch Lost now.

Casting Call

2008-03-05T14:17:00.011-05:00

Yesterday's topic of blog conversation over at Royal Toybox was: Who would play you in a movie? And, who would play Mike in a movie?

People always used to tell me, back when I was a blonde, that I look like Sarah Jessica Parker. (We even have a chin mole in the same place. Weird.)

I asked my husband who he thought would play me in a movie and he said Gwenyth Paltrow.

I asked a friend at work and she said based on my personality it would be Judy Greer.

But if I had my druthers, I would pick Cate Blanchett simply becuase she is awesome.

In my opinion, my husband Bryan is a hybrid of Brendan Fraser and Mike Meyers.

And I would say Mike over at the Toybox would be a hybrid of Kevin James and Greg Grunburg.

Now I have to go read what today's question is so I can answer it tomorrow, since that seems to be my pattern. But ha - I'm on BufBloPoFo day 5 and still blogging - that's a blog record for me!

Dope

2008-03-04T17:30:00.004-05:00

Sorry I keep straying from suggested daily topics but if I don't write what I'm thinking of at the moment, I'm afraid I'll forget to blog.

Honestly, today I am worn out from this flu that I don't have the energy to blog much, but I though I would at least take the time to remind everyone of this very important message:

Art Appreciation

2008-03-03T18:50:00.015-05:00

I was sitting in the waiting room at the doctor's office today glancing through a really cool book of abstract art. And of course I have forgotten the name of the book or the artist as the day has gone on, but it got me to thinking about the art that I like and how it has changed as I've gotten older.

In my younger days (college more than childhood, actually) I was pretty much all about Disney, as art goes. My favorite animated film has always been and always will be Sleeping Beauty, Disney's amazing film that was shot on 70mm film and stylized to look like an animated medieval tapestry and set to Tsaikovsky's amazing ballet. (and I'll have you know I actually spelled that right on the first try, or so Google tells me. Sweet!) There are a lot of Disney movies that are beautiful - Tarzan's amazing backgrounds, Beauty & The Beast's amazing everything, Mulan's awesome opening credit sequence ... but no Disney film will ever impress me more that Sleeping Beauty.

After College I discovered the Pre-Raphaelite artist John Waterhouse. (And his Pre-Raphaelite cohorts.) This is still one of my favorite paintings ever - I love the detail and the glowyness of it, and how totally romantic it is. I have a large collection of these types of prints that used to grace all the walls of my apartment. Alas, I started to outgrow the princessyness of them and stashed them away for a future guest room, but I still have a 5 x 7 print of this particular painting on display in our bathroom. There's just something about it that makes you want to know her story, don't you think?

Thanks to a friend from my days on the SpongeBob crew, I discovered the art of Yoshitaka Amano.
http://www.amanosworld.com/html/work.html
Most people know him best from his video game design work, but I love some of his other, more fine art work. This painting in particular just compels you to keep looking, lest you miss a phenomenal detail.

These days, I find my art taste strays more toward the abstract. Not just random paint splotches on a canvas or an all white canvas that the artist swears has some deeper meaning, but abstracts that evoke a place or time out of the mishmosh of color. This one is by Robert Holman. To me it looks like the New York State Finger Lakes (any of them) at the last hint of dusk. I expect to see stars start twinkling along the top of the painting any second.

This one, by Estela Lugo, I have hanging in my cubicle at work.

As a general rule, I don't particularly love Gustav Klimt, but I do love this painting, called "Tree of Life."

THis one, by Laurie Maitland, inspires me to write spooky stories, and it reminds me a little of a several books by my favorite author, Patricia McKillip.

And I love this one by Lisa Kowalski because it looks to me like flowers over concrete - soft and feminine meets gritty stone. I love opposites that work in harmony, like pro-wrestlers who happen to be poets, or bikers who sing opera.

Well, that's my art tour for today. I'm probably not the most astute art critic, but I know what I like.

All these images came from Art.com, so if you like any of them, that's where to find prints.

These Boots are Made for Blogging

2008-03-02T12:22:00.005-05:00

I am still miserably sick - moreso today than yesterday, but I will forge ahead. There's blogging to be done!

I went ahead yesterday and posted before reading on Royal Toybox that there was a topic for the day, so I plan on addressing yesterday's topic and today's in this post. Call me a blog over achiever! Just mustering the energy to move my fingers on the keyboard is an achievement today.

Playtime at Hazmat got it's name at a DSW Shoe store. My sister and I were shoe-shopping and Bryan was along for the ride. We walked past a couple pair of those popular rubber rain boots with the fun patterns on them that are all the rage for the commuter chic here in Boston. Bryan picked up one boot, looked at it for a second, and then screwed up his face and said "Eew! Hey look - it's playtime at Hazmat!" Later on when I went to create my own blog and needed a snappy, non sequitir title that would make people laugh and wonder, that quote came to mind. The name seems to fit me, like those boots: practical but quirky and totally random.

I started blogging at first so that I could have a creative outlet to write short stories or random ramblings - usually gripes about something or other told in an (hopefully) entertaining way. I figured if I blogged for a few minutes it would get me in writing mode so that when I went offline I could open up my novel and write away. After a few posts I realized blogging is also a fun way to let people know what's up in my life. I've lived in Los Angeles, Rochester NY, and now Boston in the last ten years, and my blog has turned into a fancy version of a mass e-mail to people about what's going on where I am. And as I've continued to blog I've found it's a good sounding off place to write about the annoying things I deal with (on my commute mostly) or my thoughts on TV, books and movies. I figure there are enough people out there blogging about important things and trying to change the world. I just want to entertain people.

So, that's the jist of Hazmat. As for today's question topic, the best gift I've ever received would have to be when Bryan got me tickets to Sting and Annie Lennox at Darien Lake a few years ago - though a close second would be a Kingdom of Loathing T-shirt that was a wedding gift.

Ok, back to being miserable on the couch. I watched so much HGTV yesterday that when I actually managed to sleep last night I had dreams about tiles and fabric swatches and end tables. If only I could find an Ace of Cakes marathon!

Blog Boot Camp

2008-03-01T08:25:00.004-05:00

Like my husband over at The Daily Blurb, I too am participating in the BufBloPoFo. This will be a challenge for me as I am a very sporadic blogger. I'm the same way with keeping a journal or remembering to write birthday cards. But I am all in on this one and I'm going to do my darndest to blog every day and follow the BufBloPoFo rules. And I'm going to make an attempt to not just post what I ate for dinner each day and what I watched on TV, though those are usually the highlights of my day.

Today I am besieged by snot. I woke up with the flu in full effect. I had big plans for today - helping some friends move into their new house, maybe going to the movies to see The Other Boleyn Girl which I actually just finished reading yesterday. (Good book!) But no, instead I am on the couch in my comfy bathrobe with a pile of Kleenexes and a vat of Vicks Vapo Rub. I've mustered all my reserve strength just to write this dazzling blog post, and after this I will probably doze off while watching HGTV or Ninja Turtles or The Batman.

I also threw my neck out this week taking an impromptu step aerobics class, and I'm still recovering from that quite literal pain in the neck. I don't know why I even thought I could try it. I am a doofy awkward clod - I knew there was no way I could keep up with a step class. I have no coordination! I looked like a drunk gazelle amongst swans. Won't be doing that again - I'll stick to the elliptical and the bike and do my solitary workouts in peace.

On the bright side, um, hmm ... ok, maybe one of the BufBloPoFo rules should be "do not blog while cranky" because I seem to be only complaining. Hopefully tomorrow's post will find me able to breathe through my nose and hear out of my left ear again.

At least a my computer doesn't want a sandwich from me right now. (See The Daily Blurb ...)

Pure Entertaining Genius

2008-02-03T21:32:00.001-05:00

The folks at Animal Planet are brilliant. Not only are they the reason we all know of Steve Irwin and his message of conservation, they are responsible for many other great shows that illuminate us brutish humans to the plight of animals, domesticated or not. (Check out 'The Little Zoo That Could' if you see it on the TV channel guide - great show!)

AND, the geniuses at Animal Planet came up with the concept of The Puppy Bowl. Hours on end of puppies playing. And a kitten halftime show!

Here is last year's Kitty Halftime Show - click on the icon with the kitten face. Enjoy!

FREAKIN' AWESOME FEAST

2008-02-03T21:20:00.001-05:00

OH MY GOD.

So apparently there's some big football game on right now but all I can focus on is this momentous feast in front of me. Bryan made corned beef and cabbage in the crock pot, and I made some Irish soda bread with fresh apples in it, and as I gorge myself on this feast it is being washed down with sweet delicious Guinness.

Best Super Bowl Feast Ever.

Preventing Lockjaw, Clearance Chocolates, and The Written Word

2008-02-01T10:10:00.001-05:00

Yesterday I got a tetanus shot. I now know why we only get them every 10 years - so we forget how much they freakin' hurt! I feel like I was kicked in the arm by a ninja. Not fun.

It's February! Almost time for Shmalentines day, and you know what that means: post-shmalentine day candy clearance is close at hand! This is second in clearance-candy awesomeness only to Easter, which wins with Cadbury eggs. But chocolate marshmallow hearts, watch out! I'm comin' for you on Feb. 15th!

Damn. Now I want chocolate. My Quaker oats just aren't cutting it.

In Book news, I read 4 books in the month of January. Currently I am reading River God by Wilbur Smith, which I didn't like at first but it got better and now I'm into the story. Not sure what to pick up next yet as I pine and wait for George R. R. Martin to finish writing A Dance With Dragons. One of the books I read last year, The Summoner by Gail Z. Martin, has a sequal coming out in February, but the first one was so eh that I don't really want to buy the next in hardcover, or even really at all. It will likely be a library excursion, if they have it. The Summoner was a typical group quest fantasy novel with all sorts of awful cliches and playing to character stereotypes, there was an interesting element of the main character being able to see dead people which was kind of intriuging. Any time you have a bunch of people traveling through a war-torn area, there's bound to be angry spirits waiting to talk to someone. But still, to read the stories of the dead people they encounter you have to slog through cliche dialogue and characters you've met in other novels but with differnent names here. I will likely finish River God on the train trip home tonight, so I think I will take a little trip to Barnes and Noble in search of some literary goodies this weekend. Any suggestions?

Auto Pilot

2008-01-29T09:38:00.001-05:00

So this morning I was waiting in the cold for the bus. Some miraculous feat of willpower has overtaken me, and I am taking the bus to the train station instead of driving. It's saving us $100 a month, so it's something, anyway. I don't mind the actual riding on the bus part at all. It's the waiting in the cold and the having to get up earlier part that I abhor. I've never been much of a morning person if that morning involves an alarm clock, and the last thing I want to do is sleep less and stand in the cold and wait for the bus. But hey, here I am, suddenly Mrs. Willpower, and I've saved $200 so far.

So, like I said, this morning I was waiting in the cold for the bus, and I started watching cars as they went by. And then I started counting how many of each car type I saw. Luckily I only had to wait five minutes today, but here's an inventory of cars I saw in the right lane heading east down Mass Ave in Arlington:

2 Mercedes
12 Toyota
4 Ford
3 Chevy
4 Honda
2 Saab
1 Volvo
4 Volkswagen
3 BMW
1 Acura
1 Oldsmobile
1 Buick
1 Saturn (not counting Bryan's)
1 GMC
1 Mack Truck
2 Mazda

Boy - I hope the rest of my day is as exciting as that five minutes was!

Snow Day

2008-01-14T08:40:00.001-05:00

The weather outside is frightful today, but it's also beautiful. Check out these trees outside of our living room window this morning! Yesterday we had the windows open and it was sunny and springlike. This is what we woke up to this morning. Aaah, New England.

Skankapalooza!!

2008-01-13T21:20:00.002-05:00

WOO HOO!

Let the crappy-televison-fest begin!!

Rock of Love 2 premiered tonight on VH1!

More stripping! More puking! More passed-out hose beast skanks!

It's reality TV at it's finest, ladies and gentlemen!

Don't miss it!

It's so bad! It's so awful!

But we can't help but watch.

It's like that scene in Clockwork Orange when

they peel his eyelids back and force him to watch ugly things.

Except no-one is actually forcing us to watch.

We're just compelled by the sheer insanity of it.

*shudder.*

Ugh. Gross. Nasty. Bleck!

Oop - gotta go! Commercial is over!

A Pictorial Preview ...

2008-01-06T21:30:00.001-05:00

The photos are back from the printers, and Bryan has finished writing the travelogue of our adventures in Mexico. After some editing it will appear on his blog, The Daily Blurb. In the meantime, here's a photographic preview ...

Photos by Marcy Mahoney, October 2007

Read all about it!!

2008-01-02T09:40:00.001-05:00

The last few years I have made a new year's resolution to finish reading at least 2 books a month. That was before I started commuting on the train, where I have a half hour each direction to read to my heart's content. Though only half of 2007 was this commute, I still managed to rack up a hefty list of books my eyes pored over this year, even with planning a wedding in the midst of it all. The grand total for 2007 was 36 books - definitely more than 2 per month!

It would take much too long to profile each of these books with a full on review, so I will make a simple system, and if you want further details, just ask. My simple system is this:

Awesome (Read This Book!!)
Good (I really enjoyed this, you might too)
Ok (If you're bored and have nothing else to read)
Eh (Well, it passed some time on the train anyway)
Don't Bother ('nuff said.)

So without further adieu, here are the Books Marcy Read in 2007:

First Test by Tamora Pierce Good
Fragile Things by Neil Gaiman Awesome
Harrowing the Dragon by Patricia A. McKillip Awesome
Page by Tamora Pierce Good
Squire by Tamora Pierce Good
Lady Knight by Tamora Pierce Good
The Changeling Sea by Patricia A. McKillip Good
Biting the Sun by Tanith Lee Awesome! Awesome! (Yes, that's a double Awesome)
The Giggler Treatment by Roddy Doyle OK
The Seventh Son by Orson Scott Card (re-read) Good
Four Ways to Forgiveness by Ursula K. Leguin OK
The Burning Times by Jeanne Kalogridis (re-read) AWESOME (My favorite book)
Irish Wedding Traditions by Shannon McMahon-Lichte Eh
Smoke and Mirrors by Neil Gaiman AWESOME
Irish Girls About Town by Maeve Binchy and others OK
Od Magic by Patricia A. McKillip Awesome
The Dark Mirror by Juliet Marillier Good
The Subtle Knife by Phillip Pullman Good
The Amber Spyglass by Phillip Pullman Good (HATED the ending.)
Mirror Mirror by Gregory Maguire Good
The Druid King by Norman Spinard Good
The Borgia Bride by Jeanne Kalogridis Good
A Great and Terrible Beauty by Libba Bray OK
Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman Awesome (I want to see this made into a movie!)
The Summoner by Gail Z. Martin Eh, though I will read the sequel
Watchmen by Alan Moore & Dave Gibbons AWESOME!
Fables Vol 7: Arabian Nights (and days) by Bill Willingham Good
Fables Vol 8: Wolves by Bill Willingham Good
Good Omens by Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett Awesome (I can't give Neil Gaiman any less than an Awesome on anything.)
The Queen’s Fool by Phillipa Gregory Good
Blade of Fortriu by Juliet Marillier Good
The Well of Shades by Juliet Marillier Good
A Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin (re-read) AWESOME!
A Clash of Kings by George R. R. Martin AWESOME!
A Storm of Swords by George R. R. Martin AWESOME!
A Feast for Crows by George R. R. Martin AWESOME!

Identity Crisis

2007-12-03T16:40:00.002-05:00

I don’t know who I am!

At least that’s what it sounds like every time I leave someone a message at work or sign any piece of paper needing my signature. Don’t get me wrong - I love my new name – it totally rocks. But for 31 years I have been a Dewey, and now that I’ve changed my last name, I am having the hardest time remembering my new name! My new name is on my license, my credit and debit cards, my social security card, my business cards, my mail, and my e-mail. People keep calling me Mrs. Mahoney and I’m looking around for Bryan’s mom – then I remember, “Oh, that’s me, answer them before you look like an idiot!” It’s a very strange phenomenon. Today I left a message for a client and said “Hi, this is Marcy Dew-er-uh-um-Mahoney, I’m sorry, I just got married and I keep forgetting my new name …” It’s no wonder the guy didn’t call me back! I have no idea how long this phenomenon will last for. It’s not as simple as remembering to change the date after the new year; this goes to the very core of identity. Hopefully, if enough people make me say my name and sign things, I’ll have it down pat by the time I have to remember to write 2008 instead of 2007.

Aluminum Foil

2007-11-27T21:42:00.001-05:00

Two bored dorks.

One new computer with built-in web cam and goofy photo effects.

Here's the result:

Jolly Old Saint Pimp?

2007-11-15T09:53:00.001-05:00

If I were Santa, I'd be suing for copyright infringement.

According to this article on Yahoo news today, Santa is apparently being told not to say "Ho Ho Ho" anymore because it is offensive to women.

Um, Santa coined the phrase, byatches. He's the original. I had a writing professor in college once who told me there's no original stories in the world, just variations on the same stories. I suppose that's true for slang and phrasing, too. If Santa was the first to Ho ho ho, it's quite possible the term Hip-Hop itself was stolen from Peter Cottontail. ("Hippity-Hoppity Easter's on it's way" ring a bell?)

Seriously, folks, this world is just insane. It's frickin' Santa Claus! As a female, I say let him ho all he likes. Get over it!

Playtime At Hazmat

Writing, but elsewhere

Invisible Hero

Monday Night Wrasslin' Wrapup

Thank You, Edge!!

WWE Tough Enough, Week 1

Top 10 Reasons Wrestlemania XXVII Was Awesome In High-Def

WWE & Me

Go King!

The Words Speweth Forth Onto The Page

War of Words

Shut up and fight!

*Beats Head Against Wall*

Shameless Plug

Forget Hiking or Disneyland or Celebrity Home Tours!

Dear Demographics Mongers: I AM NOT A MOM!

Bag Lady

Time's Up - Pencils Down.

NaNoWriMo-tivation

All Write Now

A Farewell to Beantown

Free Magazine Meltdown

Maya-pologies ...

Stride and Seek

4 a.m. This Morning, Chirped The Bird of Insanity

Stories From The Fridge

Beiber Pelt

Pretty Pretty Please, Vince!

A Friendly Reminder to Arlington Bicyclists

Flove

That's how I roll.

Sole-less?

Natural Cheese.

Kraft has Reinvented the Wheel

Where did the Hazmat go?

Razor Burned!

I'm a Completer!

Gas, Revisited

Dinner Party

At this moment ...

Those People

Most Embarrassing Moment

Sunday Sunday Sunday!

Greetings, Amanda of Popcorn!

There's No Place Like Home

Sleepytime

Wednesday Night Martini Madness!

Quotes from the Couch

Step By Step

Random Radio Experiment

BUFBLOPOFO is ON!

CRAPTASTIC.

Spring Preview

Ah, the life of a cat!

Been Away Too Long

Adventures in the Kitchen

Observations

The power's off and my underpants are on the sidewalk

Mutant Makeover

By The Power of Grayskull!

Put me in coach - I'm ready for pain!

A Message for Mr. McMahon

Headin' for the Hills - the Hollywood Hills

Musings after a Trip to the Pump

An Ode to Allergies

Ah, Warm Weather and the MBTA

Call Me Ponce de Leon

Trip-pin'

RatWatch, Day 11

A Public Service Announcement

It's a beautiful day!!

Comedy and Tragedy

Gastronomical Rudeness

iLuv

Obi Cat Kenobi?!

Hooray for BufBloPoFo!

O-blogitory post

I burned frozen pizza

Questions and Little Known Facts

Recommendations

Beats Head Against Wall