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Thursday, June 07, 2007

Potato Launcher

I've had it with people who drive 60 mph down residential streets.

I'm spending a lot more time as a pedestrian with my new commute to work, and it is dangerous!! And it's not just here in Boston where driving is a contact sport. I saw it happen all the time when I lived in Rochester - next to an elementary school with two playgrounds constantly teeming with young'ns. Why are you in so big of a hurry you'd risk hitting a child with your stupid gas guzzling SUV?! Primitive screwheads.

Anyway, here's what I'd like to do to warn stupid ass drivers to slow down on residential streets:

- Grab a potato launcher and a bag of potatoes.
- Get accomplice to join you with a super soaker filled with strawberry syrup.
- Hide in the bushes.
- Wait for speeding car to come by.
- When car is in range, hit car with high speed potato while accomplice squirts syrup onto windows and screams as if in agony.

Sure, it will freak out the driver. But they'll think twice the next time they floor it down a residential street.

Stupid ass drivers.

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